5: Chapter 5 Emotion Sensors
The first Miserable King Championship finals have officially begun.
Lin Feng squatted on the side of the stage, a straw in his mouth, staring at the colorful clouds above the heads of the five hundred or so people in front of him.
[Emotional Perception Ability (Primary)]
Range: 10 meters
Precision: Can only perceive emotional intensity, cannot read specific content
Color Key:
· Red: Excitement/Anger
· Yellow: Expectation/Curiosity
· Blue: Calm/Fatigue
· Green: Sadness/Loss
Lin Feng tried it for ten minutes and roughly figured out the rules—Red and yellow were good things. Blue was neutral. Green... green was his judging standard for today.
The Miserable King he was looking for would have the deepest green above their head.
The first one on stage was a coder in a plaid shirt, in his early thirties, with half his hair gone.
"I worked in Silicon Valley for eight years," he said, "and got laid off last week."
Boos erupted from the audience. Silicon Valley layoffs were in the news every day; it wasn't fresh.
The coder continued: "I had four hundred and seventy thousand dollars in stock options that hadn't vested."
The booing stopped.
The coder: "My wife is five months pregnant, and we have no insurance."
The whole venue went quiet.
The coder: "I found out the day before yesterday that my wife's obstetrician is my ex-girlfriend."
The laughter almost blew the stage away.
Lin Feng took a glance at the color above his head—it was shining green.
He silently wrote a number in his notebook: No. 1, Greenness: 8 points.
The second one to go on stage was a Latina woman in her fifties, wearing a wrinkled cleaning uniform.
"I have four children," she said.
The audience began to sympathize.
"Three are my own, and one is my husband's from his ex-wife."
Someone laughed.
"My husband's ex-wife's child is a teenager."
The laughter grew louder.
"A teenager would be one thing," the woman said expressionlessly, "but he is my ex-husband's son."
The whole venue stunned for half a second, then exploded with laughter like thunder.
Lin Feng stared at the color above the woman's head—it wasn't green at all; it was yellow?
Wait.
He sensed it carefully—the woman's yellow was tinged with a hint of red.
She didn't feel miserable. She felt satisfied.
She was telling these things on stage not to garner sympathy, but for... revenge?
Lin Feng figured it out.
He silently wrote in his notebook: No. 2, Method Actor, true misery level: 4 points.
Third, fourth, fifth...
Each one was more miserable than the last, each one more outrageous.
Some lost their jobs, some lost their houses, some lost their wives, some lost their dogs.
The most outrageous was a Mexican Guy. The first sentence he said upon taking the stage was:
"I shouldn't have come today."
The audience: "Why?"
The Mexican Guy: "I buried myself last week."
The audience: "???"
The Mexican Guy explained: "I was working at a construction site, there was a landslide, and I was buried for three hours before being dug out. It was a work injury, the company denied it, I have no money for medical treatment, and I heard there was free fried chicken here, so I came."
The whole venue fell silent.
Lin Feng looked at the color above his head—green tinged with blue, a sadness exhausted to the extreme.
He wrote in his notebook: No. 5, Greenness: 9.5 points.
When the seventh person went on stage, Lin Feng paused.
It was the woman from the corner earlier.
Early thirties, simple dress, alone.
She walked to the center of the stage, stood for three seconds, and said nothing.
The audience started heckling: "Speak! How miserable are you!"
The woman spoke up.
"My daughter is three years old."
Her voice was very soft.
"She was diagnosed with leukemia last year."
The whole venue went quiet.
"We spent a year treating her, and it drained all our money."
Lin Feng stared at the color above her head—it was green to the point of almost turning black.
"Last week, she passed away."
The woman's voice didn't tremble, but Lin Feng's chest suddenly felt like it was being gripped by someone.
[Emotional Perception Ability passively triggered—high-intensity sadness detected, distance five meters, intensity: 9.9.]
No one in the audience spoke.
Five hundred people, dead silent.
The woman continued: "I didn't come today to participate in the competition."
She raised her head and looked at the audience.
"I heard from my neighbor that the boss of this shop is also an unlucky person. I wanted to come and see how someone who is more unlucky than me manages to keep living."
Everyone's gaze in the venue turned to Lin Feng in unison.
Lin Feng was squatting on the side of the stage, the straw in his mouth chewed to pieces at some point.
He stood up and walked to the woman.
"What's your name?"
"Maria."
Lin Feng nodded and said to everyone in the audience:
"I've decided on today's Miserable King."
No one objected.
Maria was stunned for a moment: "I don't want money—"
"It's not money." Lin Feng interrupted her.
He took a wrinkled business card out of his pocket and handed it to her.
The card read:
[Joe's Fried Chicken · The boss is more miserable than you]
Lin Feng · Chief Unlucky Officer
"Start next Monday," Lin Feng said. "Room and board included, and whenever you want, you can compare your misery with mine. If you lose, it's on me; if you win—"
He paused and smiled slightly:
"If you win, I'll treat you to your daughter's share of fried chicken for the rest of your life."
Maria stared at the business card for a long time.
Then she squatted down, covered her face, and her shoulders began to tremble.
Lin Feng didn't move.
He just stood by her side, waiting.
The five hundred people around didn't move either, just watching.
A minute later, Maria stood up, her eyes red, but the corners of her mouth were actually curling up a little.
She put the business card in her pocket and said:
"What time on Monday?"
Lin Feng smiled: "Whenever. I'm more miserable than you anyway, so it's up to you."
Maria couldn't hold it back and laughed.
The laugh was very light, like the wind blowing past.
But a line of text suddenly exploded in Lin Feng's mind:
[Emotional Perception Ability triggered special feedback—]
[Target emotional state: Sadness → Hope. Conversion rate: +37%.]
[Ability proficiency increased: Current perception range expanded to 15 meters.]
Lin Feng was stunned.
This crappy ability could even level up?
That night, the video of the Miserable King Championship blew up on TikTok.
The titles were all over the place:
"Fried Chicken Shop Boss Hires Mom Who Just Lost Her Daughter On the Spot"
"America's Most Outrageous Fried Chicken Shop, the Boss Is More Effective Than a Therapist"
"I Watched a Fried Chicken Shop's Livestream Today and Cried"
The most viewed one had 4.7 million views.
The comments section:
"Damn, I clicked in laughing and exited crying."
"What's this boss's background? He's too good."
"Maria is starting next week, right? I'm going to buy fried chicken next week just to tell her to stay strong."
"Wait, is this the shop that had the 'Boss Is More Miserable Than You' thing before? Is this boss toxic? He always comes up with new tricks."
"Is he opening a fried chicken shop or a healing center?"
"I declare this the only fried chicken shop in America I want to go to."
Lin Feng squatted at the shop entrance, scrolling through his phone, his mouth grinning from ear to ear.
His phone vibrated.
[Ding—Task progress updated: Joe's Fried Chicken topic discussion volume, current ranking among American fried chicken shops: 2nd place.]
[1 rank away from the task goal.]
2nd place.
Only one left.
Lin Feng clicked on the ranking—first place was still Popeyes.
He stared at that name and bit his straw.
Popeyes, huh.
Just wait.
Suddenly, someone squatted down next to him.
Lin Feng turned his head to look; it was Maria.
"Why aren't you home yet?"
Maria didn't look at him, staring at the streetlamp across the road: "I can't sleep."
Lin Feng nodded and didn't speak.
The two of them just squatted there, half a meter apart, neither speaking.
After a long time, Maria suddenly said:
"I actually wanted to die today."
Lin Feng didn't move.
"After my daughter passed away, I felt that living had no meaning. I went out today to take one last look at the outside world."
Lin Feng still didn't move.
"I passed by here, saw so many people queuing at the door, so I came in to take a look."
She paused, turned her head to look at Lin Feng:
"Then I saw you squatting there, with a straw in your mouth, looking silly, smiling like a lunatic."
Lin Feng: "...Thanks?"
Maria laughed; this time the laugh lasted a little longer.
"I suddenly felt that if I died, I wouldn't be able to see such a silly person."
Lin Feng was silent for three seconds.
Then he stood up, patted his butt, and said to Maria:
"Then just keep living. Anyway, I'm more miserable than you, who's going to compare with me if you die?"
Maria was stunned for a moment.
Lin Feng turned to walk into the shop, then turned back after two steps:
"Oh right, remember to wear comfortable shoes when you start on Monday. It's pretty tiring standing here."
Maria watched his swaying back, the corners of her mouth curling up.
The streetlamp shone on the sign at the shop entrance:
[Joe's Fried Chicken · The boss is more miserable than you]
She stared at that sign for a long time.
Then she stood up, patted her pants, and walked in the direction of home.
After two steps, she turned back to look.
Lin Feng's back was just disappearing behind the shop door.
Maria laughed and said in a very soft voice:
"Thank you."
The wind blew this sentence away.
But a line of text suddenly exploded in Lin Feng's mind again:
[Emotional Perception Ability triggered special feedback—]
[Target emotional state: Despair → Gratitude. Conversion rate: +52%.]
[Congratulations to the host, ability proficiency increased to Intermediate.]
[New ability added: Can perceive specific types of emotions (limited to within a radius of five meters).]
Lin Feng stood in the shop, looking at that line of text, and was stunned for three seconds.
Then he smiled.
This system seems to be getting more and more interesting.
[Chapter 5 End]