115: After being diagnosed with mental illness, my readers came to my rescue

Blue Star.

Municipal Mental Health Center, Ward 3, late night.

The sensation on his fingertips was the cold metallic touch of reality.

The sound echoing in his ears was the crisp ringing of a bell, sharp enough to pierce through all lies.

Sword River Fish clutched the bell tightly in his hand.

His heart, which had just been shattered by “reality” and was ready to give up everything, to admit he was a “madman,” was rekindled at this moment by this “illusory object” that shouldn’t exist!

He wasn’t crazy!

If he was crazy, then what was this bell?

If this world was a real plane, then how could this token, which only existed in his novel, be explained?

A terrifying yet incredibly exciting thought wildly sprouted in his mind!

He remembered what Dr. Liu had said.

He remembered the “majestic” yet “pitiable” look on the old man “Qin Shi Huang’s” face when he saw the stewed pork with vermicelli his son brought.

If he really was crazy.

If all of this was just a “fantasy” woven by his brain to escape reality.

Then… how could this bell be explained?

Could “depersonalization” conjure a metallic object out of thin air that didn’t exist in the world?

Could “stress-induced disorder” transform the words he wrote into tangible, touchable “objects”?

No!

Science couldn’t!

Reason couldn’t either!

Perhaps… I’m not the one who’s crazy.

It’s this world, desperately trying to make me “normal”!

This mental hospital isn’t a place of salvation.

It’s a more refined, more hidden “cage”!

Dr. Liu, those nurses, that “Qin Shi Huang”… they are all part of this “cage”!

Their goal is to wear down my will, destroy my cognition.

To make me believe that the “story” I’ve clung to is just a ridiculous “illusion”!

And then let me willingly be “devoured” by this “reality”!

No!

He couldn’t stay here anymore.

Staying here was a dead end.

He had to escape!

He must escape!

Otherwise.

He would have his ability to think completely destroyed by those “normal” medications.

He would have his will to resist completely stripped away by those “gentle” doctors.

Ultimately, he would become a walking corpse, just like the other patients here, with empty eyes, only eating, sleeping, and excreting.

By then, Gu Jianghan, the Divinity, would have won.

Gu Jianghan, the Divinity, would watch him slowly rot and die in this cage called “reality,” like observing a pathetic insect!

Then that bastard would win the bet, completely become a “god,” and become the sole “Gu Jianghan”!

The world he created, the world that carried all his dreams and efforts, would also completely spiral out of control and become Gu Jianghan, the Divinity’s playground.

Chen Yuan would die.

All the characters he cherished would meet their demise in the most tragic ways.

A flame called “resistance” ignited in Sword River Fish’s eyes!

No!

He would never allow it!

He had to escape!

He had to open his computer!

He had to continue the story that belonged to “Chen Yuan,” to “Gu Jianghan,” and to him, “Sword River Fish”!

He would use his pen to tell the “existence” hiding behind the scenes, manipulating all of this!

I am the author!

I am the only god in this world!

He carefully tucked the bell back into the deepest part of his pocket.

Then, he lay back on the bed and closed his eyes.

But this time, he wasn’t “resigning himself to fate.”

He was “feigning.”

He was waiting, waiting for an opportunity to escape this place… In the next few days.

Sword River Fish became the most “model” patient in the entire ward.

He was the first to wake up every day, meticulously tidying his bed.

He took his medication on time every day and actively cooperated with all “treatments.”

He even proactively helped the caregivers clean and look after other “patients.”

The smile on his face grew increasingly “sincere.”

His words and actions became increasingly “normal.”

And in the eyes of the doctors and nurses, he was “recovering” at a gratifying pace.

Only Sword River Fish himself knew.

His brain, suppressed by medication, was operating at an unprecedented, frantic speed.

He was like the most precise scanner.

Recording the layout of every corner in this “cage.”

The opening and closing times of every door.

The shift patterns of every caregiver.

He knew the rotation frequency of the surveillance cameras by heart.

He knew he only had one chance.

Once he failed, he would face higher doses of medication, stricter surveillance, and eternal imprisonment.

He had to wait.

Wait for a foolproof opportunity.

However, this “cage” was sturdier than he had imagined.

All windows were welded shut.

All exits were guarded 24 hours a day.

He was like a fly, trapped in a glass bottle.

He could see the outside world, but he could never fly out.

Time passed, day by day.

Sword River Fish’s heart also sank little by little.

Am I really going to be trapped here until I die?

Will that story really end in the most absurd way, with “the author went crazy”?

Just as he was about to despair.

A ray of sunlight shone into his world, which had long been enveloped in darkness… “...Teacher Jian?”

A timid, deer-like, crisp voice sounded behind him.

Sword River Fish turned his head.

He saw a girl wearing a high school uniform and a ponytail standing behind him.

The girl was not old, she looked about sixteen or seventeen.

Her skin was very fair, and her eyes were large and bright.

Like two black jewels, steeped in a clear spring.

She was holding a stack of clean bedsheets in her arms, seemingly a child laborer helping out.

Sword River Fish knew her.

She was Lin Wan'er, the daughter of Old Lin, a caregiver in the ward.

Because her home was nearby, she would occasionally come here after school to help her father with odd jobs.

“Is something wrong?”

Sword River Fish’s tone was flat.

He didn’t want to have too much interaction with anyone in this “world.”

“No… nothing…”

The girl seemed startled by his indifferent tone.

She lowered her head, nervously twisting the corner of her clothes, looking somewhat at a loss.

“I… I just…”

“I just wanted to ask…”

Her voice grew softer and softer, almost inaudible.

“...Will the Great Emperor… ever return?”

Boom—!!!!

These words, like a thunderclap of creation, struck Sword River Fish’s head forcefully!

His mind instantly went blank!

He suddenly looked up, his lifeless eyes incredulously fixed on the girl in front of him!

She… what did she just say?

Great Emperor?

Which Great Emperor?

“...What did you say?”

Sword River Fish’s voice, due to extreme shock, became somewhat hoarse and dry.

“I… I…”

Lin Wan'er was so scared by his man-eating expression that she took two steps back.

But she still mustered her courage, looked up, and met his gaze with her clear eyes.

“I mean… Great Emperor Chen Yuan.”

“After he lost Ningxue… will he rise again?”

“Does the story… just end like this?”

It’s over… Sword River Fish felt like he was truly finished.

He wasn’t crazy, he was dying.

Dying from an emotion called “happiness.”

He looked at the girl in front of him.

Looking at her clear eyes, filled with worry and expectation.

He knew she wasn’t “acting.”

She wasn’t an “accomplice” sent by Dr. Liu.

That genuine emotion for the “story” and the “characters” was something no acting could fake!

She was… a reader!

She was my reader!

In this world, where everyone thought he was crazy.

There was actually… actually still one person who was willing to believe his “story”!

An indescribable ecstasy and grievance, like a mountain flood, broke through all his psychological defenses!

His eyes, which hadn’t shown “true emotion” for a long time, instantly turned red.

Large tears, uncontrollably, rolled down from his eyes.

He wanted to laugh, to laugh out loud!

He wanted to cry, to hold this girl and wail!

But in the end, he just bit his lip tightly.

Blocking all his emotions in his throat.

He didn’t want to scare the only “light” in this world who understood him.

“You…”

He opened his mouth, but found his voice was so choked up that he couldn’t utter a complete syllable.

Lin Wan'er, seeing his appearance, seemed to realize something too.

She wasn’t scared, nor did she flinch.

Instead, she pulled something out from behind her, as if by magic, and carefully handed it to him.

It was a bottle of iced Coca-Cola.

His favorite Coca-Cola.

This preference, he had only hidden in the main text of Chapter 17.

“You seem very tired lately.”

The girl’s voice was very soft and gentle.

“Have something sweet, you’ll feel better.”

Sword River Fish stared blankly at the bottle of Coke.

Watching the constantly condensing and dripping cold water droplets on the bottle.

He felt that they weren’t water droplets.

They were all the misunderstood tears he had shed in this white cage.

He tremblingly reached out and took the bottle of Coke.

The cold touch slightly calmed his heart, which was pounding with excitement.

“You… read it all?”

He finally found his voice again.

“Yes!”

Lin Wan'er nodded heavily, her bright eyes sparkling with adoration.

“From the first chapter of ‘Evil God as Group Leader, Group Members Beg Me Not to Speak’ all the way to the latest chapter now!”

“Teacher Jian, you write so incredibly well!”

“Especially the recent dozens of chapters, the writing and the setting are simply divine! I wait for updates every day!”

“Great Emperor Chen Yuan’s forbearance, Ye Ningxue’s sacrifice, Gu Yanci’s descent into darkness…”

“And the struggle between Humanity and Gu Jianghan, the Divinity! Oh my goodness, I’ve never read such an exciting novel!”

“It’s just… it’s just too many sad parts, I cried while reading it several times…”

The girl chattered like a little magpie, expressing her love for the story.

Sword River Fish listened quietly.

He felt like a traveler dying of thirst in a desert.

Suddenly encountering an oasis that existed only for him.

He twisted open the Coke and took a big gulp.

The cold, fizzy liquid slid down his throat and into his stomach.

An unprecedented feeling of refreshment spread through his limbs.

He felt alive again.

“Thank you.”

He looked at the girl and said sincerely.

“You’re… you’re welcome!”

Lin Wan'er’s face instantly flushed red.

“I should be the one saying thank you for being able to talk to the great author!”

“Teacher Jian… you’ll keep writing, right?”

Her eyes were full of expectation.

“Great Emperor Chen Yuan will definitely avenge Ningxue, right?”

“Lord of the End will definitely be defeated, right?”

“Yes.”

Sword River Fish looked at her, and with utmost certainty, uttered a single word.

“He will.”

“As long as I’m alive.”

Lin Wan'er smiled happily at his words.

Her smile was even brighter than the sunlight outside the window.

“That’s wonderful!”

However, the next second.

The smile on her face fell again.

“But… you’re currently…”

She glanced at Sword River Fish’s striking blue and white striped hospital gown, hesitating to speak.

Sword River Fish’s heart sank with it.

Yes.

How do I get out?

“I…”

He opened his mouth, and finally, he spoke the most insane and impractical request.

“I want to get out.”

He looked into the girl’s eyes, enunciating each word.

“Can… can you help me?”

The air seemed to freeze at this moment.

Sword River Fish’s heart was in his throat.

He knew how absurd this request was.

Asking an underage high school student to help a “mental patient” escape from a mental asylum?

This was even more outrageous than the novels he wrote!

Would she agree?

Would she think of me as a complete and utter lunatic?

Would she immediately run and tell the doctors, leading to me being locked in solitary confinement?

Just as Sword River Fish had prepared for the worst.

The girl, to his surprise, nodded.

There was no hesitation or fear in her clear eyes.

Only a resolute determination to “protect” what she cherished, without a second thought.

“Yes.”

“I’ll help you.”