56: Chapter 51 Fallen IF Path (2)

The gentle mirror was shattered, revealing what had been hidden behind it for who knows how long.

"Do you think I've only gone crazy just now?"

Mei's hand pressed onto Kaiwen's shoulder.

The force wasn't heavy, but Kaiwen's current body simply couldn't withstand it, and her whole body was pressed down along the iron pillar, her back resting against the icy ground.

The handcuffs' chain was pulled to its maximum length, and both of her wrists were rigidly locked directly above her head.

Mei's figure loomed down from above.

That light and thin robe draped forward due to the leaning movement, its neckline wide open.

From the angle Kaiwen was forced to look up, the entire patch of skin below Mei's collarbone was so white it seemed to glow, extending all the way along the curve of her chest into the shadows of the thin gauze.

The dim yellow light struck down from behind her, casting a layer of warm, velvety glow upon that expanse of snowy white.

Black hair slipped down from Mei's shoulders, hanging on both sides of Kaiwen's cheeks, sealing off all of her vision onto Mei alone.

"Do you know how long I've held back?"

Mei's voice was trembling slightly, like a string that had been taut for too long had finally snapped.

"Every day watching you chat with Monitor Fu Hua, watching you help strangers find cats, move boxes, and teach people footwork. Watching Asakura Miyuki hang on your arm and smile, watching you be good to everyone, gentle to everyone, and having time for everyone—"

Her hand slid from Kaiwen's shoulder to her wrists, her ten fingers threading through the gaps of the handcuff chain, pinning Kaiwen's hands tightly onto the ground.

"Except for me."

"How long has it been since you seriously looked at me even once?"

Raiden Mei's purple pupils reflected Kaiwen's face, and the things churning within them were so thick they were about to overflow.

Mei slowly lowered her head.

She buried her face into the crook of Kaiwen's neck, her nose tip pressing against the depression on the inner side of her collarbone, and took a deep breath.

As if confirming something.

And as if demanding something.

Warm breath hit the collarbone, spreading along the skin.

Mei's lips didn't touch the skin, but that scorching breath made one go numb more than any touch.

Kaiwen's whole body stiffened, her fingers gripping the handcuff chain tightly.

In the intermittent gaps of the flickering light, she saw Mei's eyelashes trembling, the corners of her mouth curved into a very small arc.

But to Kaiwen, that didn't feel like a smile; it felt like it was cracking apart.

Warm breaths hit the collarbone, one after another.

It was like someone was holding a red-hot iron wire suspended above her skin; although it didn't touch, that scorching heat had already burned deep into her bones.

The ground pressed against her back was very cold.

That cold seeped outward from her shoulder blades, all the way down along her spine, separated from the thin clothing at her waist by only a single layer of cloth.

Yet that small patch of skin on her collarbone was burning hot; Mei's nose tip rested there, and where the current of her breath swept past, all her goosebumps stood on end.

The feeling of cold and heat pressing down on a person at the same time was very strange.

Like being split in half.

Her wrists were pinned above her head, the handcuff chain was pulled taut, and with every movement, the metal would bite into her flesh and skin.

She tried to struggle a bit, but Mei's fingers immediately tightened, locking against the back of her hand and pressing her down even more firmly.

She couldn't exert any strength at all.

Back when she was enhanced by the Stigmata, she felt her strength could kill an ox, but now she couldn't even break free from the force of Mei's single hand.

This was what a truly ordinary person was like.

Kaiwen stared at the flickering broken little lamp overhead, her eyes stinging slightly.

Not because of the pain; those little red marks rubbed out by the handcuff chain were nothing.

There was an indescribable thing blocking her chest, unable to be spit out, nor swallowed down.

Mei's hair hung on both sides of her cheeks, the black strands brushing against her skin, tickling.

The air was filled with Mei's scent, that kind of sunny soap fragrance, which smelled very nice.

Exactly the same as what she smelled every morning when Mei stood behind her and helped dry her hair.

Too familiar.

So familiar that Kaiwen's body was relaxing instinctively, even though every string in her brain was taut to the breaking point.

This was the part that made her feel the most miserable.

If the one pinning her to the ground was an enemy, a stranger, or even a Honkai Beast, she would know what to do.

But the person pressing down on her now was Raiden Mei, who cooked breakfast for her every morning, Raiden Mei, who would quietly wait in the living room to hand her a towel after she got caught in the rain.

She simply couldn't hate her.

This realization was even more suffocating than the handcuffs and the suppressor combined.

Mei's lips finally touched her skin.

It wasn't a kiss; it was her lips pressing against the ridge line of the collarbone, rubbing past extremely slowly, as if tracing a shape.

The temperature exploded from that tiny contact area, spreading upward along the side of the neck, burning all the way to the base of her ears.

Kaiwen tried to turn her head away to dodge.

It was useless.

Mei's nose tip slid along the curve of the collarbone to the side of the neck, stopping at the spot where the pulse throbbed most noticeably, and took a deep breath.

That way of inhaling didn't seem like breathing, but rather like pulling something into her lungs, pulling it with great force and greed, as if wanting to carve every trace of scent from Kaiwen's skin into her own body.

"Mei, listen to me—"

Mei didn't raise her head.

Her lips rubbed from the side of the neck to that small piece of soft skin beneath the base of her ear, taking another slow, deep breath.

The exhaled hot breath hit her auricle, scorching Kaiwen so that her whole body trembled.

"This is meaningless—"

Still no response.

Mei acted as if she couldn't hear her speak.

Or heard her, but didn't care.

She only pressed her face closer, her nose tip pressing deep into Kaiwen's hair roots.

Purple hair and white hair were tangled together, unable to distinguish whose body temperature was scorching and whose fingertips were cool.

The fingers locked on Kaiwen's wrists actually loosened a bit.

Not letting go, but no longer needing to exert force, because the weight of Mei's whole body had pressed up, chest against chest, separated only by that layer of gauze so thin it was almost nonexistent, their body temperatures directly burning through the gap between the two layers of clothing.

Kaiwen could feel Mei's heartbeat.

Fast. Abnormally fast.

Completely different in rhythm from her superficially indulgent actions.

"Mei."

Kaiwen called her name for the third time.

Her voice was no longer as steady as before, carrying a bit of hoarseness.

Mei finally moved.

But not raising her head; instead, she moved away from the hair roots, going all the way down along Kaiwen's neck.

Her lips brushed past the side of the throat, not kissing, just rubbing, the illusory touch like a burnt-out fuse, dragging a scorching trace across the skin.

Then returning to the collarbone.

Mei stopped there, burying her entire face into it.

The shoulder hollow, collarbone, base of the neck.

She stuffed herself into this narrow triangular zone, like an animal that had finally found its nest, stubbornly shrinking there, her breathing gradually growing deep and heavy.

Not speaking.

Saying nothing at all.

Kaiwen lay flat on her back on the icy ground, handcuffs biting into her wrists, the suppressor on her neck emitting a faint blue light, pressed down upon by a trembling Raiden Mei who refused to let go even unto death.

What could she say?

Scold her? She couldn't bring herself to scold her.

Push her? She couldn't push her away.

Reason with her? She wouldn't even raise her head.

Kaiwen just lay like that, staring at the nearly broken lamp on the ceiling, listening to Mei's breath after breath, feeling that the string in her chest that had always been taut finally began to loosen as well.

Not from being moved.

It was from exhaustion.

Truly not knowing what to do with her anymore.

Mei took another breath, longer this time than any before.

When she exhaled, it carried an imperceptible tremor, hitting the depression of the collarbone, and the heat swirled around in that small pool of shadow before dispersing.

Kaiwen closed her eyes.

She once again smelled that clean soap fragrance on Mei.

Just like the scent in the apartment.

Just like every ordinary morning that could never be returned to.