119: Chapter 119 The Investiture of the Gods Ceremony? No, it's the Anniversary Barbecue!

The Deification Ceremony organized by the World Government for Gu Fan was scheduled for the first anniversary of the Evil God's disappearance.

The location chosen was the central plaza of Tianqiong City.

This place was once severely damaged during the final battle; now, a magnificent White Jade Divine Altar rose from the ground.

The divine altar was carved from a single piece of Kunlun Mountain warm jade, surrounded by nine giant pillars representing the nine major Alliance districts, engraved with the heroic deeds of humanity after the Great Cataclysm.

Leaders, powerhouses, and celebrities from around the globe gathered here.

They wore formal attire, their expressions solemn, not even daring to breathe.

Tens of billions of gazes, through ubiquitous holographic projections, focused on this unprecedented ceremony.

They were waiting.

Waiting for the man who single-handedly ended the cosmic disaster and initiated the "Lying Flat Era" with a single command to ascend the divine altar and receive the worship of the entire world.

The host was a world-famous "national spokesperson," having practiced the script thousands of times.

At this moment, he stood by the divine altar, fine sweat appearing on his forehead.

Ten minutes had already passed since the scheduled time of the ceremony.

But the protagonist still had not appeared.

"Is... God unhappy?"

"Did these formalisms we Mortals arranged anger him?"

"It's over, it's over. I said we shouldn't have held some Deification Ceremony; lying flat is what God likes most."

Panic began to spread across the bullet comments of the global livestream.

The atmosphere of the venue also gradually shifted from solemn to awkward and tense.

The Old Speaker of the First Alliance District sat at the head of the VIP seats, constantly wiping sweat and casting a pleading look at the Sea-Stabilizing Divine Monk beside him.

"Divine Monk, look at this..."

The old monk was unable to "stabilize the sea" at this moment either.

He shook his head with a bitter smile.

Who could guess the thoughts of that existence?

Just as the world fell into panic, thinking God had abandoned them...

Inside the supreme command center of the Tianqiong City Radio and Television Tower, the Chief Director was going crazy with anxiety.

He roared into the communicator.

"Search! Search for him!"

"Even if you have to turn Tianqiong City upside down, find Mr. Gu!"

"All drones, take off! Go to every place he might be!"

A news drone belonging to the "Tianqiong Archives" program received this absolute order.

Its operator was a newly hired young man who, clinging to a final shred of hope, set the drone's flight path to the coordinates that had now become a global Holy Land—Tianqiong War God Academy, Dormitory 404.

The drone flew over the completely transformed city.

Flew over crowds of people leisurely sunbathing on the lawns.

Finally, it hovered above the rooftop of Dormitory 404.

A burnt aroma of grilled meat forced its way into the drone's sampler, mixed with the scents of cumin and chili.

Below the lens, a lively scene came into view.

The missing protagonist was wearing an apron printed with the words "Labor is Most Glorious," a handful of skewers in his left hand and a brush in his right, busily working in front of a giant barbecue grill, drenched in sweat.

"Xiao Fan! You're fanning too hard! Everything over here is about to get burnt!"

"President, it's because you brushed on too much oil yourself; look, it's all dripping down!"

"Nonsense! The Soul of barbecue is the oil! Don't you understand?"

"You call that Soul? You call that a fire hazard!"

Xiao Fan, the Vice President of the Lying Flat Society, was holding a large cattail leaf fan, arguing fiercely with the President.

Nearby, Lin Xue sat under a sunshade, elegantly holding a glass of freshly squeezed juice, casting a disdainful look at the two childish men before her.

In the corner, the King of Housekeeping, Xiao Hei, was meticulously wiping a folding table that had just been splashed with oil droplets using a snow-white cloth to military standards, muttering under his breath.

"Cleanliness dropped by 0.1 percent, deep polishing required... that'll cost extra."

Meanwhile, the Cosmic Hamster "French Fries," whose size had shrunk to that of a small pickup truck, was lying obediently at the edge of the rooftop, nibbling happily on a specially made "Big Mac" carrot as thick as a utility pole.

Inside the command center, the Chief Director stared at the images sent back by the drone, completely stunned.

He was silent for three seconds.

Then, as if having made a certain decision, he slammed his hand onto the control console and roared with bloodshot eyes.

"Switch the signal!"

"Switch the main feed of the global livestream to the rooftop!"

The assistant director's face changed: "Chief Director! That's the Deification Ceremony! This..."

"Ceremony my ass!"

The Chief Director waved his hand, adopting an air of 'nothing left to lose.'

"This is the true divine ceremony!"

The next second...

The image before the tens of billions of viewers worldwide suddenly changed.

The solemn White Jade Divine Altar disappeared.

In its place was a smoky, bustling barbecue stall.

The entire world fell into absolute silence for ten seconds.

Everyone's eyes widened as they watched their apron-clad savior arguing heatedly with his deputy over a skewer of burnt chicken wings.

Finally, Xiao Fan remembered something; he glanced at the time on his wristband and urgently advised...

"Oh, President, stop arguing!"

"The Deification Ceremony has already started; the whole world is waiting for you!"

Gu Fan didn't even look up.

He stuffed the burnt chicken wing into his mouth, replying indistinctly as he chewed.

"What Deification Ceremony?"

"Is it as important as the first anniversary celebration of our Lying Flat Society?"

He picked up a handful of freshly grilled kidneys from the side and held them out to Xiao Fan, his face beaming with pride as if saying, "Praise me quickly."

"Quick, try these big kidneys I just grilled."

"I'm telling you, the heat has to be just right."

"A bit more and it's tough, a bit less and it's raw; this is the Dao!"

Global audience: "..."

They were silent.

Then, the next second.

"Pfft—"

Countless people who were drinking water spat it all out at once.

So... this was the truth of the divine oracle?

The Dao is... grilled kidneys?

Immediately afterward, the internet exploded.

"I knew it! God wouldn't deign to participate in our Mortal ceremonies!"

"The Lying Flat Society Anniversary! This is the number one celebration in the Universe!"

"Say no more! I'm in Tianqiong City right now! Brothers, see you on the War God Academy rooftop! I'm going to eat skewers grilled by God's own hands!"

"Team up! Team up! For those outside Tianqiong City coordinates, I'm driving and can take four more!"

People all over the city swarmed toward Tianqiong War God Academy like crazy.

No.

It was the whole world.

Everyone in Tianqiong City rushed out from their homes, parks, and workplaces.

They didn't want to watch some empty ceremony.

They only wanted to go to that small rooftop and have a bite of the skewers grilled by God's own hands.

Thus, an absurd scene in world history unfolded.

The magnificent Deification Ceremony venue became empty, leaving only the host standing bewildered in the wind.

Meanwhile, the rooftop and the area below Tianqiong War God Academy were packed tight, becoming the world's largest and most down-to-earth open-air banquet.

Gu Fan was surrounded by reporters squeezed into the crowd.

A young female reporter worked up the courage to hold the microphone to his mouth and asked with eyes full of admiration...

"Mr... Mr. Gu! As the guardian god of this world, what are your thoughts?"

Gu Fan was nibbling on a cob of corn; hearing this, he paused, thought seriously for a moment, and then replied.

"Don't call me a god."

"A god's KPIs are too heavy; it doesn't align with my core values."

He swallowed the last bite of corn and let out a long sigh of relief.

"I'm just an ordinary citizen who wants to live a peaceful life."

"My dream is world peace."

"Because that way, no one will bother me while I'm sleeping."

These words spread throughout the world via the livestream.

From then on, the "Deification Ceremony" in the annals of human history was quietly crossed out and changed to another name—the "Cosmic Barbecue Festival."

...

The revelry of the party continued until late at night.

When the last group of satisfied citizens was persuaded to leave, tranquility finally returned to the rooftop.

Gu Fan lay unceremoniously on the lounge chair Xiao Hei had just cleaned, looking at the brilliant galaxy across the sky and letting out a comfortable burp.

Xiao Fan and Lin Xue sat beside him, their faces also filled with satisfaction and ease.

Everything was fine.

Quiet, peaceful, perfect.

Suddenly, Gu Fan opened his eyes.

He pointed to the deep night sky and said thoughtfully to his friends beside him...

"Speaking of which..."

"This Universe seems to have... a little bit of other noise."