113: Chapter 113 The Destructive Power of Serious Nonsense

Yu Qian chuckled too, spreading his hands helplessly: "How am I supposed to follow that?"

Guo Degang ignored him, turned to face the audience, and shouted: "Does everyone want to see this gentleman perform?"

"Yes—!"

Thousands of audience members responded in unison, their voices deafening.

Guo Degang clapped his hands sharply: "Good! Since everyone wants to see it, then let's do it tomorrow..."

"Hey, hey, hey!"

Yu Qian grabbed Guo Degang's sleeve, his face flushed with urgency: "Hold on! Didn't you just say it was a big surprise for today? How did it change to tomorrow in the blink of an eye?"

Guo Degang spread his hands, widened his bull-like eyes, and asked with an innocent face: "Did I say today just now?"

Yu Qian grew anxious: "Of course you did! The audience down there heard you!"

Guo Degang frowned, reached up to rub the fat on his chin, and looked troubled: "Oh my... that's tricky. The ticket prices for tonight haven't been raised yet!"

"Boooo—!!!"

The entire audience spontaneously let out a deafening chorus of boos, condemning the money-grubbing, black-hearted fatty.

Yu Qian was amused too, pointing at him and scolding: "Can't you keep those wicked thoughts to yourself?"

Guo Degang chuckled, then put away his playful expression and said seriously: "Alright, enough joking. Next, let us welcome today's special mystery guest—Mr. Lin Chen—with the warmest applause!"

Hearing this name, the audience instinctively began to applaud.

But a few seconds later, the initially warm atmosphere instantly turned into a chaotic buzz of whispers.

The name Lin Chen is definitely not unfamiliar to anyone who frequently surfs the internet.

In terms of internet popularity and buzz, Lin Chen is absolutely a top-tier celebrity right now.

He has two labels he cannot shake off: First, the "King of Free-loading" who got incredibly lucky and married five top national goddesses simultaneously.

Second, because of the hit variety show Divas Hit the Road, he became a mysterious figure full of controversy and legendary color.

The audience below was divided into two camps.

Fans who had watched the show were rubbing their hands in excitement, craning their necks to peer toward the backstage passage.

Because they knew Lin Chen's abilities all too well!

Magic, Ventriloquism, Singing, Kung Fu—he's practically a cheat code in human skin!

As for the pure passersby who hadn't watched the show, they were completely bewildered and couldn't help but whisper to each other:

"Lin Chen? That internet-famous pretty boy? What is he doing here?"

"Did that fatty take the wrong medicine? A freeloader, and he deserves to be called 'Mr.'?"

"Damn, Deyun Society has lost all its bottom lines just for traffic, right?"

"I bet it's his five superstar wives pulling strings behind the scenes, bribing Deyun Society to force him onto the stage to boost his reputation."

"What if... he actually has some real skills? If he didn't have some special talent, could he keep five top-tier actresses so obediently satisfied?"

"Didn't they debunk that and say their marriage was a system bug?"

"Give me a break, that kind of official statement is obviously a PR stunt. You actually believe that?"

Just as the audience was whispering, Lin Chen walked slowly out from the passage on the side of the stage.

He was wearing a snow-white, well-fitted Chinese robe, his hands hanging naturally at his sides, his pace leisurely and composed.

Facing thousands of scrutinizing eyes in the audience, he showed no trace of the awkwardness or nervousness of a first-time performer; instead, he exuded an innate laziness and otherworldly ease.

Coupled with his flawless face, like a sculpture from ancient Greece, standing there, it truly lived up to the old saying: A jade-like figure on the road, a peerless young master in this world!

"Ahhhhh!!! Teacher Lin! Husband, I love you!!!"

"Teacher Lin, look here! I want to have your babies!!!"

"Don't panic, you rebellious son! Your dads are down here holding the fort for you!"

"Go Teacher Lin! Let these bumpkins see what a dimension-reduction strike looks like!"

"Teacher Lin, sing quickly! I want to hear myth!"

The passersby who were whispering just moments ago were instantly drowned out by this overwhelming wave of screams.

Especially the young female fans in the front row, who were like they had been injected with adrenaline, screaming at the top of their lungs.

Those who didn't know better would have thought this was the concert of some top Japanese or Korean boy band, not a place to listen to Crosstalk.

This crazy scene made Yang Mi, Tong Liya, and Dilraba Dilmurat, who were sitting in the VIP seats, couldn't help but turn their heads repeatedly and frown.

Although they knew in their hearts that these women were just purely fanatical fans and posed no real threat.

But after being in the entertainment industry for so many years, who doesn't know that there is never a shortage of extremely fanatical fans—beautiful, hot-bodied, and willing to do anything to sleep with their idol?

What's more, their man has that kind of "pump and dump" personality!

The three women exchanged glances, and a highest-level alarm sounded in their hearts simultaneously: They must guard against this strictly!

"Teacher Lin!"

Guo Degang walked up with a beaming smile, led Lin Chen to the center of the stage, and had him stand between himself and Yu Qian.

Lin Chen stood before the microphone, not rushing to speak, but leisurely looked around, then said calmly:

"I didn't notice backstage just now, but this venue is actually quite large. Not only is the ground floor full, but the second and third floors are packed with people too."

Guo Degang followed his lead: "Exactly! Business at our Deyun Society is good, and today is indeed a full house."

Lin Chen gave an "Oh," then turned his head, stared at Guo Degang with a straight face, and asked very sincerely: "Those sitting in the last row of the second and third floors, is it because they can't afford tickets for the front rows?"

"Hahahaha!!!"

"Boooo—!!"

"Teacher Lin, we have money! The front row tickets were snatched up by scalpers!!"

The audience instantly erupted into thunderous laughter and deafening whistles.

The art of Crosstalk is completely different from attending a concert or watching a play.

If it were a concert, if anyone dared to heckle from the audience, security would throw you out directly.

But in a Crosstalk venue, it's normal for the audience to heckle; this is called "xian gua" (on-the-spot improvisation).

Good "xian gua" not only doesn't disrupt the performers' rhythm, but can actually push the atmosphere to a climax.

Of course, there are rules to this.

You can't have ten thousand people answering the next line whenever the performer says the previous one; that would turn into a chorus, and the performer wouldn't be able to do anything.

"Yes!"

Guo Degang was also amused by Lin Chen's sudden deadpan demeanor, and gestured toward the audience on the second floor: "Maybe they're a bit short on cash these days; otherwise, they would have bought VIP seats and sat right in front of your face."

"Boooo—!!!"

The audience upstairs collectively let out an even louder chorus of boos, and many raised their middle fingers in protest.

On the Crosstalk stage, the word "boo" can be called a panacea.

It not only represents jeering but also a unique, intimate interaction between the audience and the performers.

Guo Degang put away his smile and turned to Lin Chen: "Teacher Lin, this should be your first time at our Deyun Society venue, right?"

Lin Chen nodded like a pounding pestle: "That's right, first time for everything."

Guo Degang continued to prompt: "Then do you usually listen to our Crosstalk?"

Lin Chen looked serious: "Listen, I must listen. I am your die-hard fan. Not only do I love listening to it, but the ladies at home play it on loop every day; they absolutely love you guys."

"Oh my, that really flatters us. To receive the favor of Teacher Lin and your lovely wives is a huge honor for our Deyun Society."

Guo Degang cupped his hands in a salute, then turned to show off to Yu Qian: "Brother Qian, look at this. To be remembered by such a top superstar, the feeling is just different!"

Yu Qian smiled and played along: "Indeed, this is what they call 'making the humble abode shine'."

Lin Chen climbed up the pole, continuing to spout nonsense with a straight face: "I don't just like your Crosstalk; I know all the stars in your society like the back of my hand."

"Oh?" Guo Degang became interested. "It seems Teacher Lin has really put in the effort to understand our Deyun Society?"

Lin Chen extended his right index finger, his expression extremely focused, counting on his fingers: "For example, I really like that Teacher Zhao. My wife, Yang Mi, loves watching Teacher Zhao's performances the most."

Teacher Zhao?

Guo Degang was stunned, Yu Qian was confused, and the thousands of audience members looked at each other in bewilderment.

In the Deyun Society with over a hundred people, when did a big shot named Zhao appear who ranked above Guo Degang and could be called "Teacher"? Does such a person exist?

Lin Chen didn't seem to notice the strange atmosphere and continued counting down on his fingers: "Besides Teacher Zhao, there's also Song Xiaobao, Xiao Shenyang, Zhao Si, Liu Neng... I've seen all these big names..."

"Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!"

"Teacher Lin! Shut up! Calm down! Calm down!"

Hearing these thunderous names, Guo Degang and Yu Qian turned green in the face, and the two of them, one on the left and one on the right, hurriedly reached out to cover Lin Chen's mouth, dragging him back desperately.

The audience below was stunned for a full two seconds, then erupted into the craziest laughter of the night, their heckling almost blowing the roof off.

"Hahahaha! Teacher Lin is amazing! What the hell, Teacher Zhao!"

"Help! This rebellious son's way of spouting nonsense with a straight face is too toxic!"

"Teacher Lin, we want to see Nicholas Zhao Si dance too!"

"Screw your Deyun Society! We want to watch the Liu Laogen Stage!"

"Everyone, stop messing around! Stop it!"

Guo Degang wiped the cold sweat from his forehead, waved his hands repeatedly at the audience, then grabbed Lin Chen's arm tightly, lowered his voice, and roared in a feigned exasperated manner:

"Teacher Lin, you've come to the wrong set! Those people you're mentioning are the pillars of the Liu Laogen Stage; they are our sworn enemies!"

"Wait a moment."

Lin Chen completely ignored Guo Degang's frantic state.

He calmly took his phone out of his robe sleeve, held it to his ear, and said in a volume that the whole venue could hear:

"Hello? Wife, it's me. You need to send a car to pick me up right now. Yes, I think I walked into the wrong venue. What? You're busy? No, you must come! The people here all look fierce and menacing, especially that short fatty; I'm afraid they'll hit me."

"Hahahaha!"

The audience laughed until they were bent over, tears streaming down their faces.

This time, even those pure passersby who hadn't watched Lin Chen's variety show were completely conquered by this kind of "gap moe" deadpan humor, joining in the crazy heckling and applause.

In less than three minutes, with just a few words, Lin Chen easily reversed the prejudice half the audience had against him.

In fact, not only the audience, but even Guo Degang, Yu Qian, and Yue Yunpeng hiding backstage were shocked by Lin Chen's "xian gua".

Guo Degang didn't invite Lin Chen expecting him to perform Crosstalk at all.

He just wanted him to go on stage and casually demonstrate some Ventriloquism or magic, or even just sing a song to get by.

After all, his fame was there; he was enough to serve as a mascot.

But who could have imagined that this kid would be so relaxed on stage!

And his performance style was unique.

Guo Degang relies on the humor and self-deprecation of a small, grassroots character; Yue Yunpeng relies on being "shameless" and "cute".

And Lin Chen? From beginning to end, he maintained the demeanor of a cold, noble, and elegant young master, expressionless, spouting nonsense with a straight face.

This strong sense of contrast, instead, was able to produce an incredibly terrifying comedic effect.