43: Chapter 43, The Eighth Set of Broadcast Gymnastics, and the Ancient God's Conjunctivitis
Inside the Scripture Pavilion, the sound of reading was loud.
But these were not the words of sages, nor were they cultivation scriptures.
"Wangcai! My Wangcai! You died so miserably!"
In the corner, an iron-blooded tough guy from the Enforcement Hall was weeping over a shriveled cockroach corpse.
He held a copy of "Les Misérables (Insect Edition)" and cried his heart out.
"You were just a cockroach, why did you have to endure pesticide at such an age..."
Elsewhere, two Inner Sect Disciples who were usually at odds were now cheek-to-cheek, nose-to-nose, gazing affectionately at each other.
"Senior Brother, your nose hair... is so upright, full of masculine energy."
"Junior Brother, your eye boogers... are also like morning stars, lighting up my heart."
They each held half a copy of "What Constitutes a Love Brain," clearly having developed a deep resonance with each other's Souls.
In the center of the hall, Sect Master Gu Canghai sat cross-legged, sweating profusely, his eyes bloodshot.
The heavy book in his arms, "Sect Management: How to Gracefully Pass the Buck," was engaged in a fierce tug-of-war with his Dao Heart.
"No! I am the Sect Master! I shall shoulder the honor and disgrace of the Sect myself! I will never pass the buck!"
"But... but this buck is so round, so shiny, so silky... carrying it on my back must be so cool..."
Gu Canghai's Dao Heart was dancing wildly on the edge of collapse and reconstruction.
On the second-floor railing, Li Mo was eating melon seeds, watching the chaotic scene downstairs with great interest.
Not bad.
Sanity values were steadily dropping to zero.
The more thoroughly insane you are, the less the things outside can do to you.
The so-called "Abyssal pollution" is merely the forced overwriting of low-dimensional reality by high-dimensional information.
It's like jamming alien code into a Windows computer; the result is naturally a blue screen and total alienation.
But if the computer already had nine hundred types of viruses, the desktop was playing "Brothers, give him some action," and the CPU was singing "Deja Vu"...
Then the alien code would probably have to shout, "Brother, we're on the same side" upon entering.
This is called professional alignment.
Just then.
Boom—!!!
An unprecedented, terrifying muffled thunder ignored the building's barriers and exploded deep within everyone's Divine Soul!
The lights in the Scripture Pavilion dimmed suddenly, then were stained with an ominous dark red.
The bizarre books that had been torturing everyone instantly stopped all movement.
They "snapped" shut, their pages curling in fear, desperately trying to drill into the deepest crevices of the bookshelves, as if they had encountered an absolute natural enemy they could not resist.
"It's here."
Li Mo threw away the melon seed shells and clapped his hands.
The leisure on his face faded, leaving only a cold calmness.
Through the cracks in the windows sealed by the books, one could see that the sky outside had vanished.
In its place was an eyeball.
A single eye that occupied the entire firmament, so huge it completely exceeded the comprehension of any living being.
It had no eyelids, and its pale whites were covered in purple-black blood vessels as thick as mountain ranges.
The pupil, deep as a black hole, slowly rotated, eventually locking its focus firmly on the ant-like Scripture Pavilion on the ground.
Abyssal Lord — [The Watcher].
Just by the projection of a single gaze, the gray fog outside the Scripture Pavilion boiled violently.
The pavilions and thousand-year-old trees that hadn't had time to dissipate had their "thickness" and "depth" forcibly erased the moment the gaze swept over them.
They transformed from three-dimensional entities into twisted, grotesque two-dimensional "paintings" stuck to the ground.
The entire back mountain of the Heavenly River Sword Sect turned into an indescribable giant oil painting.
"This... what kind of Realm is this?"
Gu Canghai woke up from the illusion of passing the buck, his Soul trembling under the absolute suppression of the life hierarchy, and he collapsed to the ground in despair.
"Soul Transformation? No... even the legendary Soul Transformation Old Ancestor would be no different from dust in front of this eye..."
"Creak... screech..."
The roof of the Scripture Pavilion groaned under the unbearable weight, and eerie eyeball-like patterns began to appear on the tiles.
The giant eye was "focusing."
It didn't need any attack.
It only needed to "look."
Anything it "looked" at seriously would either vanish completely from this world or become a part of it.
[Warning! Warning!]
["Divinity" rule invasion detected!]
[The opponent is rewriting the underlying logic of the Scripture Pavilion: setting it as "non-existent"!]
["Asylum" entry defense overloaded... Fear value is consuming rapidly...]
The blood-red alarm screens were scrolling crazily on the System panel.
Although the Disciples in the pavilion couldn't see the scene outside, the suffocating feeling of their existence being erased caused their already fragile mental defenses to collapse completely.
"My hand! My hand has become thin! I can't see my hand!"
"Eyes... there are eyes everywhere looking at me..."
Some started scratching their skin frantically, seemingly wanting to dig that invisible gaze out of their flesh.
Li Mo exhaled a breath of turbid air and took out the spring and autumn brush he hadn't used for a long time.
"Want to look my turf out of existence?"
"Nice eyes, let me borrow them."
Li Mo sneered, and his figure instantly appeared on the roof of the Scripture Pavilion.
To the outside world, he was still protected by the rules of the Scripture Pavilion, just standing at the highest point of the building.
He looked up and met the gaze of the terrifying giant eye that occupied the entire sky indifferently.
To a Mortal, seeing it would be great terror, great despair.
But in Li Mo's [Eye of True Sight], it was merely a pile of chaotic data flow aggregates composed of countless greedy, hungry, and insane thoughts.
A pile of... garbled code.
"Since you like looking so much, I'll let you look to your heart's content."
Li Mo held the brush in mid-air.
Beside him, the "dragon vein heavenly book" moved without wind, its pages rustling.
The brush tip was like a knife, and Li Mo quickly wrote a new setting on the page.
This time, he didn't try to modify reality.
The opponent's status was too high; with his current energy, it wasn't enough to write an Abyssal Lord projection to death directly.
But he could "define" the next behavior of this eye.
[Setting Four: Within a hundred miles of the Scripture Pavilion, set as a mandatory "Eye Exercises" execution zone.]
[Supplementary clause: Any creature with "gaze" ability, as long as it gazes at this area for more than three seconds, must unconditionally cooperate with the rhythm of the radio calisthenics to perform vision protection exercises.]
The last stroke fell.
The "dragon vein heavenly book" erupted with golden light, like a sword of creation, instantly tearing through the deathly silent gray fog and striking the firmament fiercely!
At the same time.
The loudspeaker Formation in the Scripture Pavilion, which had been broken for many years, suddenly burst into a "buzzing" electrical sound.
Immediately after, a crisp, magical voice that seemed to walk out of everyone's childhood nightmares rang through the heavens and earth—
"For the revolution, protect your eyesight!"
"Eye exercises—now begin!"
In that instant, time and space seemed to have been pressed on pause.
In the sky, the [The Watcher] that was about to unleash divine punishment for world destruction froze completely.
A chain of causality called "rules" ignored its divinity, ignored its status, and wrapped around its optic nerves savagely and crudely.
An impulse it couldn't understand, let alone resist, surged up from the depths of its Origin.
An impulse to... rub its eyes.
Rumble—
The clouds above the firmament surged violently.
In the stunned gaze of all survivors on the ground, two huge, white cloud hands condensed from the thick Abyssal mist on both sides of the giant eyeball.
Then.
Those two cloud hands extended thumbs comparable to mountain ranges, pressing with extreme precision onto the... uh, presumably the Zanzhu acupoint position above the eyeball.
Accompanied by that magical beat.
"First section, rub the Tianying acupoint."
"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight..."
The cloud hands' fingers began to press and rotate forcefully, one by one.
"Two, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight..."
"Roar???"
[The Watcher] let out a roar filled with confusion, shock, and extreme humiliation.
It wanted to resist!
It was an Abyssal Lord! An ancient god who had destroyed countless worlds! The nightmare of billions of living beings!
How could it perform such an unheard-of, bizarre ritual in this backwater?!
It tried to widen its eyes, wanting to burn the ant on the roof to ashes with its rage.
But the voice of the broadcast was like an supreme decree of the Heavenly Dao, brooking no refusal:
"Second section, squeeze and press the Jingming acupoint!"
Pfft.
The cloud hands uncontrollably moved to the inner corners of the eyes, and two fingers squeezed hard.
Aww—!!!
This press was so powerful that it made [The Watcher] shed physiological tears on the spot.
Whoosh—
It started pouring rain from the sky.
But this rain was not transparent; it was purple-black "God's Tears" containing rich Abyssal energy.
"Ah! This rain is poisonous... Wait? No!"
On the ground, a Disciple subconsciously reached out to catch a drop of rain.
The purple-black tear landed on his palm and instantly turned into an extremely pure Soul Power, drilling into his body.
His Divine Soul, which was on the verge of disorder due to reading the strange books, not only recovered instantly under the nourishment of this Soul Power but also grew several times stronger!
"It's Divine Essence! It's top-grade Spirit Refining spiritual liquid!"
The Grand Elder's voice was distorted with excitement, "Quick! Don't just stand there! Get the buckets! Get the pots! This is a heavenly Opportunity bestowed by the Ancestor Master!"
For a moment, the painting style changed abruptly again.
The people of the Heavenly River Sword Sect, who were just mourning like they were waiting to die, were now beaming with excitement. They rushed out of the protection range of the Scripture Pavilion with the fastest speed in their lives, taking out all kinds of pots and pans, scrambling to grab the "eye-washing water" falling from the sky.
"Get out of the way, all of you! I called dibs on that foot basin first!"
"Junior Brother, didn't you pee yourself in fear just now? Why are you faster than anyone else now?"
"Nonsense! Wealth is sought in danger! The Ancestor Master is awesome (voice crack)!"
And high above the heavens.
[The Watcher] was about to go crazy.
It not only had to be forced to do exercises, but it also had to watch these ants scramble for its tears of shame and indignation as if they were supreme treasures.
This was blasphemy!
This was a public execution of a great deity!
"Third section, press and rub the Sibai acupoint..."
The broadcast continued.
The cloud hands rubbed frantically under its huge eye sockets, even rubbing its eyeball into various indescribable shapes.
"Roar—!!!" (I'm not playing anymore!!!)
Finally, when the broadcast read the fourth section "Press the temples, wheel-scrape the eye sockets," [The Watcher]'s will completely collapsed.
It could no longer endure this double torture of Soul and body.
It would rather lose its divinity Origin than force a disconnection from this projection!
Boom!!!
The giant eyeball in the sky, like a punctured low-quality balloon, exploded with a roar in a scream of unwillingness!
The sky full of purple-black energy lost its conscious control and turned into a real torrential rain, pouring down.
At the same time, the magical broadcast sound stopped just right.
"Eye exercises end here. To protect your eyes, please look into the distance."
The wind stopped.
The rain was still falling.
But the terrifying pressure that could crush the mind had vanished like smoke.
Li Mo stood on the roof, retracting his hand that was trembling slightly due to the severe consumption of Mental Energy.
He looked at the Sect members celebrating in the rain of "God's Tears" below, a trace of tired smile appearing on his face.
"It seems this 'Cultivation Version of Radio Calisthenics' has remarkable curative effects."
[Ding!]
[Successfully repelled the Abyssal Lord projection.]
[Achievement obtained: [Ancient God Ophthalmologist].]
[Scripture Pavilion fame skyrocketed (in the Abyss Realm), Fear value +5000.]
[New permission unlocked: You can start reading "Yellow Emperor's Inner Canon (Original · Forbidden Chapter)" .]
Li Mo let out a long sigh of relief, his figure flickering, and he disappeared from the roof.
And inside the Scripture Pavilion.
Gu Canghai carefully held a basin full of "God's Tears," blankly looking up at the sky.
For a long time, he suddenly turned around, threw himself to the ground, and kowtowed to the plaque that read [Scripture Pavilion].
"Disciple is dull! Disciple is dull!"
Tears streamed down his old face, and his voice was full of the fanaticism of sudden enlightenment.
"So this was the Ancestor Master's profound meaning!"
"Strengthening the body! Protecting eyesight! This is the fundamental Great Dao to resist evil ways and even achieve Immortal Ascension!"
"Pass on my decree!" Gu Canghai stood up abruptly, his voice like a bell.
"From tomorrow, the whole Sect will promote this set of... this 'Divine Descent Eye Protection Exercises'! Practice it once every morning and evening! Anyone who is lazy will be expelled from the Sect and never employed again!"
The Disciples were shocked, then shouted in unison: "We obey the Sect Master's decree! Long live the Ancestor Master! Protecting eyesight is everyone's responsibility!"
Second floor.
Li Mo, who was just about to lie down and rest, heard the deafening slogans downstairs and slipped, almost rolling off the rocking chair.
"...A sin."
He held his forehead and muttered to himself.
"I'm afraid the painting style of this Heavenly River Sword Sect will never go back."