46: Chapter 46 The Frenzy of Involution Hanging on the Tree, and the Official Establishment of the "Southern Wilderness Mental Hospital"
The style of the Heavenly River Sword Sect had completely shifted from "collapsed" to "nuclear fusion."
It all started half an hour ago.
The Libationer of the Jixia Academy, Kong Mengchang, who was hailed as a great Confucian of the age, had attained enlightenment under the influence of "Postpartum Care for Sows."
And the enlightenment was quite thorough.
At this moment, the Main Peak Square was no longer a battlefield.
It was the most terrifying... examination hall in the history of the Cultivation World.
"Swish, swish, swish—"
Thousands of brushes rubbed against paper, merging into a noise that scraped the Soul, making one's scalp tingle.
In the center of the square, Kong Mengchang's figure floated in the air.
His Vast Righteous Qi, which symbolized the integrity of a gentleman, had mutated into an unsettling pink glow.
In his hand, he no longer held the scrolls of sages, but a giant Judge's Pen the size of a door.
His eyes burned with blood-red light; it was no longer the wisdom of a scholar, but the fanaticism of a proctor from Hell.
"Half an incense stick left!"
Amplified by the pink Vast Righteous Qi, Kong Mengchang's voice turned into physical sound waves, making everyone's eardrums buzz.
"Question three: 'Discuss the dialectical relationship between the edible value of Tentacle Monsters and the Confucian Way of Benevolence'!"
"Those who haven't finished, pick a branch to the southeast and hang yourselves up!"
Behind him, the "Strange Book Tree," transformed from an apple core Li Mo had casually discarded, already blotted out the sun.
Now, its lush branches were covered with a dazzling array of "fruits."
They were people.
There were Sword Cultivators of the Tianhe Sect and Confucian Scholars of the Jixia Academy.
They were hung upside down by ropes made of book pages, their bodies swaying in the wind, yet they still held wooden boards, their brush tips dancing frantically on the exam papers.
"It's too hard... this question simply isn't for humans..."
A Disciple of the academy hanging from the tree let out a cry of despair.
"The question is: 'If the abyss gazes at you, in what posture should you stare back to maintain the etiquette of a Confucian?'"
"Is this a fucking Confucian exam question a human could come up with?!"
The upside-down Sword Cultivator Senior Brother next to him remained unusually calm, only giving him a cold glance.
"Choose C."
The Senior Brother's brush speed was so fast it left afterimages.
"Chapter 3, Section 7 of 'The Self-Cultivation of a Mental Patient' clearly states that at this moment, one should quickly remove their trousers and face the abyss with their buttocks. This is the highest Realm of 'See No Evil'."
"This act perfectly practices the Confucian etiquette of avoiding the world while giving the abyss the maximum level of humiliation on a spiritual level."
The academy Disciple was stunned on the spot.
A moment later, a look of ecstatic realization appeared on his face.
"I have been enlightened! Senior Brother is a great talent! It was I who was shallow!"
...
Scripture Pavilion, second floor.
Li Mo looked at the spectacular "Hell Painting" below. A segment of an orange he had just peeled hung in mid-air, forgotten before it reached his mouth.
"This old man Kong..."
He muttered to himself.
"When he was at the Jixia Academy, he wasn't in charge of the academic affairs office, but the psychiatric department, right?"
His original intention was just to teach these stubborn Confucian Scholars to be flexible, so they wouldn't always try to hit rocks with eggs and use Vast Righteous Qi to head-on clash with the eerie.
As it turned out, he never expected this.
Once these Confucian Scholars accepted "madman logic," their deep-seated drive for research was a hundred times more terrifying than a Sword Cultivator practicing with a sword.
They... they actually systematized, textbookized, and involuted "Eerie Studies"!
"Cousin, look over there in the corner."
Chu Linger pointed her little finger.
Sect Master Gu Canghai was leading several Sect Elders, surrounding Su Qianqian and other high-level members of the academy, their faces overflowing with a near-frenzied academic passion.
Li Mo's gaze narrowed slightly.
[Eye of True Sight] activated, and the noisy square instantly fell silent. Only the voices in that corner were infinitely amplified, flowing clearly into his ears.
Gu Canghai was slapping his thigh, excitedly proposing: "The 'Flat Ground Trip' divine skill passed down by our Sect's Ancestor Master must be added to the practical combat curriculum! This is the supreme method for countering all humanoid eerie beings!"
Su Qianqian's brows furrowed as she added rigorously: "Agreed. But it must be integrated with the Confucian spirit of 'Shendu'. That is, even when no one is watching, the posture of falling must remain elegant to manifest the character of our literati."
An academy Elder stroked his beard and pondered: "Indeed. Additionally, for eyeball-shaped eerie beings like 'The Watcher,' I propose introducing 'Eye Exercises' as a compulsory course. Perhaps we can reform them from the root."
Hearing this, the Elders' expressions turned solemn, and they praised in unison: "Excellent! Truly excellent!"
Li Mo: "..."
It's over.
These two top powers of the Southern Desolation were now completely welded together.
And they were on the broad road to the mental asylum, holding hands, singing songs, with the accelerator floored—no one was getting off.
[Ding!]
The System notification sounded at the right time.
[Detected that the "Heavenly River Sword Sect" and "Jixia Academy" have reached a deep spiritual resonance, causing a chain reaction at the rule level.]
[The urban legend "Examination Hell" has been solidified and upgraded to a permanent Sect dungeon.]
[Congratulations, Host, for unlocking the special achievement: [Educator (Pseudo)]!]
[Obtained new term: [Forced Remedial Class].]
[Term effect: You can designate any hostile target within range and forcibly drag their consciousness into the "Thinking Remedial Space." In this space, if they do not complete three sets of "five-year simulation," any of the target's physical attacks will permanently fail against you.]
Li Mo's expression became somewhat strange.
This ability... was simply a Divine Artifact tailored for a "man of culture" like him.
In the future, whoever dared to provoke him would be stuffed with a set of advanced calculus papers without a word.
Only when they successfully calculated the derivative could they talk about drawing a sword.
...
Although the style within the Sect had spiraled completely out of control, the practical effect brought by this "everyone-is-exam-crazy" state was astonishing.
The abyss gray mist that was originally infiltrating and probing the outskirts of the Sect suffered unprecedented spiritual bullying after encountering this group of "test-grinders."
Any eerie creature that dared to poke its head out...
...would immediately have three to five Disciples howling as they rushed forward.
They didn't draw swords; instead, they took out rulers to measure its dimensions, pulled out books to pry its mouth open and reason with it, and even grabbed it to force it to answer "brain teasers."
For abyss creatures that relied on "chaos" and "fear" as their source of power, this kind of attack filled with "order" and "logic" (albeit madman logic) was more lethal than Holy Light or divine fire.
In just half a day...
...the gray mist occupying a hundred miles around the Tianhe Sect was actually forced back thirty miles by the "learning passion" of these Cultivators!
...
Night fell.
It should have been the time when a hundred ghosts walk the night and Yin Qi is at its peak.
Tonight, however, the Heavenly River Sword Sect was brightly lit, as clear as day.
"Study by the lamp! Fight to the end!"
"As long as you don't die from studying, study until you die!"
Outside the Scripture Pavilion, slogans rose wave after wave, filled with the passion of struggle.
Li Mo's head throbbed from the noise, so he casually wrote a [Silence] rule and pasted it on the window.
The world finally became quiet.
"It seems things have temporarily stabilized on this side."
He sat back at his desk and spread out that ancient "dragon vein heavenly book."
Although the Heavenly River Sword Sect was safe, he didn't relax in the slightest.
This was merely the brief and eerie silence before the storm.
The projection of [The Watcher] was destroyed; the abyss would never let it go.
The full "surrender" of the Jixia Academy would be like a bomb, detonating the entire Central Continent Cultivation World.
And...
Li Mo's gaze fell on the next chapter title in the outline preview.
"Shadow Sect."
The organization whose top assassin he had scared off with a single sentence at the beginning of the story.
Since that assassin named "Wuying" was driven mad last time, the organization had gone silent. But in Li Mo's spiritual sense, there had always been a cold, poisonous gaze peering here incessantly from the distant north.
...
Meanwhile.
Thousands of miles away, in a sunless underground limestone cave.
This was the location of the Shadow Sect's Southern Desolation sub-branch.
"What did you say?"
The sub-branch leader, "Guiying," sat on a throne piled with countless skeletons. His figure, nearly invisible in the darkness, trembled slightly at his subordinate's report.
His voice sounded like countless dry bones rubbing together, parched and piercing.
"The Heavenly River Sword Sect... has gone mad?"
"Ye... yes, Branch Leader!"
A black-clad scout prostrated on the ground, his body still shaking uncontrollably.
"Your subordinate observed from afar with a 'Recording Stone' for a whole day... They, they didn't look like they were fighting; they looked like they were collectively performing a shamanic dance! They were even reciting books to the air! Even Kong Mengchang of the Jixia Academy... has, has joined in!"
"And..." The scout swallowed hard, his eyes full of terror.
"Your subordinate saw with his own eyes that they took a captured abyss monster... and planted it in the soil! They forced it to bloom! If it didn't bloom... they would whip it with books!"
Guiying fell into a long silence.
As the Shadow Sect branch leader, he had seen thousands of kinds of death and created countless tragedies.
But an operation like "forcing a monster to bloom" was something he was hearing for the first time. It already exceeded his lifelong understanding of the word "torture."
"You mean, they didn't repel the abyss, but... were completely contaminated by the abyss?" Guiying asked hoarsely.
"It must be so!" The scout said decisively.
"Think about it, Branch Leader, what normal Cultivator could do such a ridiculous thing? That Heavenly River Sword Sect must have fallen into an abyss demon cave in the human world! Even those hypocritical 'gentlemen' of the Jixia Academy have been brainwashed and assimilated!"
"Good!"
"A great opportunity!"
Guiying suddenly stood up from the skeleton throne, the eyes hidden in the shadow of his hood bursting with two points of ghostly green flame.
The humiliating failure of the "Wuying" mission had always been a dark cloud hanging over the Southern Desolation branch. The Sect's high-level members were extremely wary of that so-called "mysterious expert" of the Tianhe Sect.
Now, everything could be explained!
There was no mysterious expert at all!
It was just a group of poor wretches driven mad by the abyss!
"Pass my order!"
Guiying let out a series of owl-like laughs that echoed in the empty cave.
"Immediately spread this news to all the major Righteous Path Sects in the Southern Desolation! And those uncivilized old fogies in the Central Continent!"
"Say... the Heavenly River Sword Sect has colluded with the abyss alongside the Jixia Academy. The whole Sect has entered the demonic path and is performing some kind of unspeakable evil sacrificial ritual!"
"We shall act on behalf of Heaven and launch... the [Demon Extermination Order]!"
"This seat will gather the Righteous Path of the world to completely eradicate that so-called Sect..."
"No, that mental hospital, from the map of the Southern Desolation!"
...
Inside the Scripture Pavilion.
Li Mo, who was focused on petting his cat, suddenly felt an itch in his nose.
"Achoo!"
He rubbed his nose and looked down at the lazy little black cat in his arms.
"Who's talking about me behind my back? Could it be your aunts and uncles from your abyss hometown are planning to come in a group to deliver their heads again?"
The little black cat rolled its eyes disdainfully, stretched out its tail, and lightly tapped the north on the table.
The meaning was clear: [Some idiots want to cause trouble.]
"Cause trouble?"
Li Mo smiled, a smile carrying a hint of dangerous pleasure.
He stood up, walked slowly to the bookshelf, and ran his long fingers lightly over the spines of the books.
"The Art of War," "Thick Black Theory," "On Protracted War," "An Actor's Self-Cultivation"...
"Just right."
"My 'Southern Desolation's Number One Mental Hospital' has just opened for business, and I'm lacking a few blind negative examples to liven up the opening ceremony."
"Since they want to play the old-fashioned drama of 'exterminating demons and defending the Dao'..."
Li Mo's finger stopped on a book titled "How to Bamboozle Your Enemies Until They're Lame," pulled it out gently, and patted the dust off the cover.
"Then I'll let them experience firsthand what is called... a dimensional reduction strike from knowledge."
"Linger!" he called out.
"In!"
Chu Linger, who was hunched over the table fighting a battle of wits against a set of "five-year simulation," sprang up like a coiled spring, standing perfectly straight.
Li Mo's voice carried a relaxed tone of someone who didn't mind the trouble being big.
"Go and notify the two 'Deans,' Gu Canghai and Kong Mengchang."
"Say... tomorrow, our Sect is going to hold an 'Open Day' event."
"Welcome friends from all walks of life to come to our hospital to 'visit, learn, and exchange'."
"Oh, right."
Li Mo's gaze turned to the large tree outside the window covered in "fruits," his lips curling into a meaningful arc.
"By the way, tell them to prune that tree and make some more space."
"I have a premonition that a new batch of 'ornaments' will soon be delivering themselves to our door."