131: Chapter 130 youyouyou

Jiang Zhiyu stood to the side with his arms crossed, a satisfied smile of "all according to plan" (even if the process had gone a bit off-track) on his face.

Thanks to his relentless efforts (and forceful pushing), Group C's market trial had finally evolved from a simple sales task into a massive variety show disaster (or feast) that blended roleplay, slapstick comedy, an impromptu courtroom show, and the symbolism of fruits and vegetables!

Sakura and Jang Wonyoung exchanged a glance, both seeing the same realization in each other's eyes: even though it was shameful, even though it was absurd, it... actually seemed kind of fun?

At the very least, seeing Jiang PD get "objectioned" (even if overruled), and watching Kim Minju forced into the role of the "Red Cabbage Judge"... it was worth it!

Judge Kim Minju (Red Cabbage Edition) had just announced the start of the proceedings with a plastic megaphone and summoned "Defendant Number One," the Hello Kitty plushie, leaving the scene in a subtle silence as everyone waited for the "feline" to give its statement.

The Kitty plushie clutched its ball of colorful yarn, its huge, expressionless round face "looking" toward the judge's bench, then "glancing" at the golden retriever plushie next to it, before finally turning toward Kim Minju in apparent "bewilderment."

A few seconds later, a high-pitched, electronically distorted voice emanated from its throat: "Meow~ meow meow, meow, meow meow meow~"

(Translation: It wasn't me, that's not true, the dog started it. I'm just an innocent little kitty passing by.)

Kim Minju: "..." Sakura, Jang Wonyoung, and the passersby who were pricking up their ears: "..."

"Um... Defendant Kitty," Kim Minju struggled to maintain her judicial solemnity, though the corners of her mouth were already twitching, "This court... does not understand Cat. Could you, or rather, could the staff member operating you, please state your case in Korean? Or English would work too."

She attempted to communicate rationally.

The Kitty plushie seemed to understand "Korean" and "English"; it tilted its big head, and then spoke again: "Meow! Meow meow meow! Meow~!"

(Still Cat, just switched to "International Meow.")

Kim Minju covered her forehead. Sakura couldn't help but complain: "Does it only know how to meow? Staff-nim! Can you be a bit more professional! Speak human language!"

At this moment, a golden retriever plushie standing next to Kitty (let's call it Golden Retriever A) seemed dissatisfied with Kitty's "accusation." It turned toward Kitty, and a low, distorted "woof" sound emitted from its throat: "Woof! Grrr... Woof! Woof woof woof! Woof woof woof woof woof!"

(Translation: You're lying! It was clearly you who tripped me with the yarn ball first! And you peeked at where I hid my bone! The evil cat cries wolf first!)

Another golden retriever (Golden Retriever B) joined the support, barking wildly at Kitty: "Woof woof! Awoo! Woof woof woof!"

(Translation: Exactly! Bad kitty! Stealing the spotlight!)

For a moment, it was a lively scene of cats meowing and dogs barking in the "defendant's dock." Although the staff inside the plushie suits seemed to be trying very hard to express "anger" and "accusations" through their tone, to the ears of bystanders, it was just a string of meaningless "meows" and "woofs," mixed with strange electronic noise from the voice changers.

Jang Wonyoung, balancing the water bottle on her head, strained to listen (not daring to turn her head), then whispered with a look of collapse: "I can't... understand anything at all... Can you speak Korean?? English is fine too!!" Her final shout was a bit too loud due to her emotional agitation, causing the water bottle on her head to wobble precariously again.

Sakura also joined the protest: "Exactly! You guys are 'Star Demons Claws'! Aren't you supposed to whisper and bewitch people in your setting? How can you not even speak human language? This batch of minions has terrible professional skills! Jiang PD! Deduct their pay!"

Judge Kim Minju also helplessly shouted with the megaphone: "Order! Order! I ask both sides... er, I ask all three parties to use the official language of this court! Otherwise, this court will deem it a waiver of the right to testify!"

However, the plushies seemed completely immersed in their own "language system" and "grudges."

Kitty felt angry at Golden Retriever A's "slander" (expressed by clutching the yarn ball and stomping its huge plush feet), and launched a series of even more rapid "meow" attacks at Golden Retriever A.

Golden Retriever A was not to be outdone, standing upright (the staff inside the plush suit must have been tired from standing on tiptoes), waving its "paws" and making a pouncing motion. Golden Retriever B cheered from the side with "woofs" and rammed its body into Kitty.

Accusations and defenses quickly escalated into the prelude to physical conflict.

"Meow!" "Woof!" "Meow meow meow!" "Woof woof woof!"

Amidst the noise, Golden Retriever A seemed to be provoked by Kitty's "meow" offensive. It gave up on "verbal" communication, suddenly reached out its plush "paw," snatched the precious yarn ball that Kitty had been holding, and then triumphantly (shown by shaking its head) held it in its mouth (the opening in the plushie's mouth).

"Meow—!!!" Kitty let out a sharp (distorted) scream, as if its lifeline had been stolen. It immediately pounced, trying to snatch the yarn ball back.

Golden Retriever A ran away with the yarn ball in its mouth (at the clumsy speed of a plush suit). Seeing this, Golden Retriever B seemed to think snatching things was fun and joined the fray, trying to wrestle the yarn ball from A's mouth.

Thus, the scene instantly turned into a chaotic situation where two golden retriever plushies were fighting over a yarn ball, while the Kitty plushie chased after them trying to take it back.

The three huge, furry plushies staged an extremely childish "Yarn Ball Tug-of-War" within the limited chalk circle of the "defendant's dock."

They pushed and tripped over each other (the plush suits made their movements clumsy, and falling looked like slow motion), bumped into each other with their bodies, and kept making "woo," "woof," and "meow" sounds. The yarn ball flew back and forth between them (being thrown or snatched), and the colorful yarn traced messy arcs in the air.

Where was this an evil siege by "Star Demons Claws"? It was clearly three giant plush toys with a mental age of no more than three fighting! And the most childish kind at that!

Judge Kim Minju held the megaphone, completely dumbfounded, not knowing how to "adjudicate" this sudden "yarn ball tragedy."

Sakura was already laughing so hard she was squatting on the ground, slapping her thigh.

Jang Wonyoung, while worried about the water bottle, couldn't help but want to watch this good show. Her neck was stiff and sore, but her eyes were wide open.

The onlookers were even more delighted, filming with their phones even more enthusiastically. Some people were shouting: "Go! Golden Retriever! Grab it!" "Kitty, hurry and chase!" "Oh no, it fell! So cute!"

Just as this chaos reached its peak, with the three plushies almost rolled into a ball and yarn tangled everywhere—

Jiang Zhiyu, who had been watching from the sidelines with his arms crossed and an inscrutable smile on his face, suddenly had his eyes light up!

"Good opportunity!" he whispered, then strode to the side of the chaotic "defendant's dock" and shouted with his highly penetrating voice at Sakura, who was laughing until she was shaking:

"Sakura! Look! The Star Demons Claws have been affected by Minju's 'Fair Judgment' ultimate move, falling into infighting and chaos! Their power is being neutralized by the force of 'equilibrium'!"

He pointed at the three plushies rolling into a ball, his tone full of excitement and incitement:

"This is the invisible power of 'Scales of Fair Judgment'! It doesn't attack directly, but it can make evil contradict itself and fall into imbalance! Minju has done very well!"

Judge Kim Minju (holding the red cabbage and megaphone version), suddenly named and praised: "...?" (What did I do? I just wanted them to speak human language...)

Jiang Zhiyu didn't give them time to think. His scorching gaze locked onto Sakura, and he roared with an even more impassioned, war-drum-like voice:

"But! Judgment can only create chaos; it cannot completely purify evil! Now, at the moment when the minions are weakest and most chaotic, is the best time to completely crush them!"

"Sakura! Wonyoung is waiting! Minju's judgment requires final execution! As the 'Saintess of Sakura', protecting companions and purifying evil is your vocation!"

He took a deep breath, as if to pour all his strength into the following words. His voice raised until it almost cracked, filled with unquestionable command and extreme... shameful incitement:

"Right now! Seize this fleeting opportunity!"

"Cast aside distracting thoughts! Gather all your heart of protection and soul of cherry blossoms!"

"Against these Star Demons Claws caught in infighting—"

Jiang Zhiyu paused for half a second, then, using all his strength, shouted out the ultimate shameful line that he had been pining for and absolutely had to make Sakura say herself, with earth-shattering force:

"Shout out your ultimate move loudly!!!!!"

"'Love and Justice Sakura Kill! Rice Cake Ball Instant Kill Array'！！！！！！！"

The final move name was practically roared out. The sound echoed in the noisy market, even temporarily drowning out the meows and woofs of the plushies and the laughter of the onlookers.

Everyone's gaze focused once again on Sakura, who had just stopped laughing, her expression frozen on her face as if struck by lightning.

The plushies' roughhousing also seemed to pause for a moment because of this shout, and three huge, furry heads (covered in dust and yarn) turned toward Sakura simultaneously.

Kim Minju held the megaphone, opened her mouth, but couldn't say anything.

Jang Wonyoung, balancing the water bottle, held her breath.

Sakura squatted on the ground and slowly, extremely stiffly, stood up. She looked at Jiang Zhiyu's eyes, full of "expectation" and "compulsion," looked at the three plushies that were funny but indeed interpreted as "infighting due to judgment," and then looked at the trapped Wonyoung and the bewildered Minju next to her...

Although Jiang Zhiyu's logic chain was bizarre, in this time and place, it had eerily formed a situation of being "forced into a corner."

Shout, and be so ashamed you ascend to heaven on the spot.

Don't shout? It seemed... a bit unfair to the "chaotic" minions (?) and the "in need of rescue" Wonyoung? Plus, Jiang PD had shouted like this, and the atmosphere had been built up to this point...

Under the mixed impact of extreme shame, absurdity, and a trace of a "sense of mission" warped by this chaotic situation and Jiang Zhiyu's twisted logic, Sakura's face turned red as if it were dripping blood. She closed her eyes tightly, clenched her fists so hard her nails dug into her palms.

Then, she suddenly raised her head, eyes still tightly closed, as if using up all the courage of her life and abandoning all idol dignity. Toward the direction of the three plushies, from the depths of her throat, she squeezed out a string of broken syllables, filled with trembling and a crying tone, but with astonishing volume:

"Love, Love and Justice... Sakura Kill... Rice Cake Ball... Instant, Instant Kill Array——!!"

After shouting the last word, she seemed to have all her strength drained. Her body swayed, and she almost collapsed again, but her eyes remained tightly closed, not daring to look at anyone's reaction.

A corner of the market fell into dead silence.

Only that red cabbage, serving as the "sacred fruit and vegetable," remained bright purple in the sunlight.

On Jiang Zhiyu's face, a satisfied, even somewhat benevolent (?) bright smile finally appeared, like an old farmer seeing a golden wheat field during harvest.

It! Worked!

Although the process was bizarre and twisted, although the minions became funny plushies, although the court became a red cabbage farce...

But he, Jiang Zhiyu, had ultimately made the "Saintess of Sakura" Sakura shout that ultimate move name with off-the-charts shame in this noisy vegetable market!

The soul of variety shows, a great victory!

The lingering sound of Sakura's "Rice Cake Ball Instant Kill Array," with its crying tone and cracked voice, seemed to still be trembling in the greasy and warm air of the market. She kept her eyes tightly closed, her cheeks hot enough to fry an egg, her body trembling slightly, already psychologically prepared to be laughed at by passersby, teased (or pitied) by her companions, and to have this dark history accompany the rest of her career.