53: Chapter 53 If you are sexually harassed (regardless of gender), please call 110 immediately.

Official Announcement for Episode One of "SM Entertainment Weekend Special"

A few days later, in the early morning, a massive LED screen was prominently erected at the main entrance of the SM Entertainment headquarters building.

Usually, this screen would only scroll through the latest music videos, concert teasers, or official announcements of its artists. But today, the content on the screen caused all passing employees, trainees, and even outsiders coming for business to stop in their tracks and gasp.

On the screen was a large poster with an extremely exaggerated design, vivid colors, and a composition full of... "variety show flair."

[Poster Main Body]

Background: A giant, steaming bowl of instant noodles (2D cartoon style). Inside the bowl weren't noodles, but various dancing little figures, musical notes, chili peppers, eggs, and... a rabbit wearing a chef's hat? The background color scheme was tomato red and bright yellow, creating a massive visual impact.

Central Title:

Battle to the End, Chef Min!

The font was chubby with oil-splatter special effects, as if sauce could drip down at any moment.

Subtitle:

"SM Entertainment Weekend Special" Episode 1 · Hilarious Cooking Life-and-Death Battle!

Below the poster were "Chibi Battle Stance" illustrations of the participating guests:

Im Yoona: Wearing exaggerated sunglasses, holding a golden soup spoon, with a "mischievous smile" on her face.

Bae Joo-hyun (Irene): Still cool and elegant, but holding a pair of "frost chopsticks" emitting cold air, her gaze sharp.

Kang Seulgi (Seulgi): Silly-looking, holding a giant frying pan as a shield with a fried egg on her head.

Park Sooyoung (Joy): Jumping lively, swinging a "chili whip" in her hand with a bright smile.

Wendy (Son Seung-wan): Professionally holding a tuning fork (?), with a row of seasoning bottles arranged like a musical scale in front of her.

Kim Yerim (Yeri): The smallest Chibi version, but riding on a giant "Instant Noodle Rocket," holding a flag that says "maknae ON TOP."

At the very bottom of the poster was a line of small text:

"Special Guest Judge/Rule Maker: Jiang Zhiyu (Kind Smile.jpg)"

Next to it was a stick-figure version of Jiang Zhiyu, wearing a chef's hat but holding a hammer labeled "Rules," with a standard "harmless smile" on his face—though anyone familiar with him could see the "killing intent" beneath that smile.

The edges of the poster also featured various explosion-effect text:

"The Looting War Begins!"

"The Emoji Headgear Terror Approaches!"

"Golden Card · Privilege Descends!"

"Losers Will Face Public Execution!"

At the very bottom was the broadcast information:

Recording Time: This Saturday

Broadcast Platform: SM Official Channel & Partner Streaming Media

Format: Live Broadcast + Edited Version

The moment this poster appeared, it was as if a depth charge had been dropped into the entirety of SM Entertainment.

"Mworago?! What is this?!" A planning department employee holding documents froze in front of the screen, his glasses nearly sliding off.

"Yoona Sunbae? Irene Sunbae? They're going to... have an instant noodle competition? And it's live?" A trainee who had just finished morning class covered her mouth, her eyes wide as saucers.

"Producer Jiang is the judge? That 'Saltwater Devil'?" Someone recalled the rumors from the kitchen classroom, their voice trembling.

"Check the group chat! Check the group chat! The internal company app just sent a push notification!" someone shouted.

Everyone immediately lowered their heads and pulled out their phones.

At the very top of the homepage of the SM-exclusive "S.M. Family" app was a pinned announcement:

[Important Notice & All-Member Vote]

The final decision on the theme for "SM Entertainment Weekend Special" Episode 1—is in your hands!

Clicking in revealed a short video where Jiang Zhiyu appeared on screen, with that familiar kitchen classroom as the background. He was wearing a simple white shirt, his expression calm, but there was a faint, hard-to-detect... allure in his eyes?

"Hello, everyone in the SM family. I am Jiang Zhiyu." He gave a slight nod to the camera. "The first episode of the 'SM Entertainment Weekend Special' is about to be recorded. As shown on the poster, this will be a variety show challenge combining cooking, music, dance, games, and... a few 'cruel' rules."

"However—" he changed the subject, "the final cooking theme has not yet been decided. The production team has received many suggestions, and now, we are giving the power of choice to all members of SM."

The screen switched, showing three options:

[A. Classic Showdown: Instant Noodle War]

(Description: The national dish; basic but full of variables, testing creativity and improvisation.)

[B. Sweet Storm: Dessert Workshop]

(Description: Cakes, puddings, macarons... the slaughter behind the sweetness might be even more cruel?)

[C. Hell Challenge: Mystery Bento]

(Description: The production team provides 'unexpected' ingredient combinations to challenge the participants' understanding and courage.)

"The voting rules are as follows:" Jiang Zhiyu's voice continued. "All current employees, signed artists, and registered trainees of SM Entertainment can cast a real-name vote through the internal app. One vote per person. Voting deadline: 18:00 today."

"The option with the highest number of votes will become the final theme for the first episode." The corners of his mouth curled into an extremely faint arc that made one's spine chill. "And all members who vote for the winning option will have a chance to be drawn for 'Live Audience Seats'—to witness this 'Weekend War' with their own eyes."

"Additionally," he added, his gaze sharp, "after the voting results are announced, the production team will 'fine-tune' the game rules based on the final theme. Please look forward to it."

The video ended.

Below the app interface were the prominent voting buttons and a real-time vote count bar (currently, all three options were at 0 votes, as the voting had clearly just opened).

The entire SM Entertainment company, from the basement practice rooms to the high-level offices, instantly boiled over!

Red Velvet Waiting Room.

Yeri screamed while holding her phone: "Unnies! Vote quickly! Instant noodles! It has to be instant noodles! The poster is all about noodle bowls!"

Joy leaned over: "But desserts sound fun too! We could have a cream fight!"

Wendy analyzed rationally: "Mystery Bento... feels too risky. What if we draw something weird?"

Kang Seulgi asked blankly: "Do we... need to vote for ourselves? Aren't we the contestants?"

Bae Joo-hyun sat in front of the vanity mirror, looking at the three options on her phone screen, then looked up at her expressionless face in the mirror. Instant noodles... Jiang Zhiyu had specifically set instant noodles as the tentative theme and made such an exaggerated poster; he clearly had a preference. Moreover, the 'saltwater' he gave them before... was there a connection between instant noodles and saltwater?

She lowered her eyelashes and tapped her slender finger lightly on the screen.

[A. Classic Showdown: Instant Noodle War]

"I'm voting for instant noodles," she said calmly.

"Eh? Why?" Yeri was curious.

Bae Joo-hyun didn't explain. She just put down her phone, picked up her water cup, and took a sip. As the warm water went down her throat, it seemed to still carry a faint, inexplicable saltiness.

Girls' Generation Group Chat.

[Sunny]: Has everyone voted? Which one? I voted for instant noodles! It's obviously a trap dug by Jiang Zhiyu! I want to see Yoona do an instant noodle dance!

[Tiffany]: Desserts! Desserts are so romantic! Yoona can make a strawberry cake!

[Yuri]: Mystery Bento! Exciting! There might even be live octopus!

[Sooyoung]: I voted for instant noodles. My intuition tells me that kid Jiang Zhiyu buried the most landmines in the instant noodles.

[Hyoyeon]: +1, instant noodles.

[Seohyun]: I think desserts fit the concept of healthy eating better... however, for the sake of the program's effect, I voted for instant noodles.

[Taeyeon]: ...Instant noodles.

[Yoona]: Hey! Why are you all voting for instant noodles?! If you actually get drawn as live audience members, are you coming just to laugh at me?!

[Sunny]: Of course! What else? [Funny]

[Yoona]: ...Friendship over.

Im Yoona looked at the sea of "instant noodles" in the group chat, her teeth itching with annoyance, but she still obediently opened the app and stared at the three options.

Instant noodles... Jiang Zhiyu's home turf. She had heard rumors (from Lee Tima's complaints) about that guy's obsession with instant noodles and his bizarre ways of eating them. Choosing this was equivalent to jumping into the battlefield he had prepared.

Desserts? It seemed a bit safer, but... knowing Jiang Zhiyu's character, he would definitely add chili powder to the cream.

Mystery Bento? The unknown was the most terrifying.

After weighing it over and over, Im Yoona narrowed her eyes and her slender finger pressed down decisively—

[A. Classic Showdown: Instant Noodle War]

If we're going to play, let's play big. Jiang Zhiyu, bring it on. This time, I'm definitely going to win the Golden Card, and then... the first thing I'll do is order you to wear an Emoji Headgear and dance to "Gee"!

aespa Practice Room.

Kim Minjeong, NingNing, and Karina were huddled together.

"The Unnies are participating in this?" NingNing's eyes sparkled. "I really want to go see it live!"

"Let's vote, vote for Irene Unnie and the others," Kim Minjeong said. "Instant noodles seem to suit them better?"

Karina pondered: "Jiang Zhiyu Oppa is the judge... anything he designs will definitely not be simple. Instant noodles might just be the surface."

But in the end, all three also voted for instant noodles—out of support for their seniors and a bit of "watching for the chaos" curiosity.

Certain NCT Members' Group Chat.

Taeyong: [Are we participating in this vote?]

Jaehyun: [Vote, might as well since we're free. I'm voting for instant noodles. I heard Sunbae Jiang Zhiyu cooks instant noodles pretty well (?)]

Mark: [Instant noodles +1, the poster is cool.]

Huang Renjun: [Instant noodles, I feel like it'll be hilarious.]

Chenle: [Instant noodles, instant noodles! I want to see Joy Noona swing a chili whip!]

High-level Office.

Lee Soo-man stood by the floor-to-ceiling window with a teacup, looking down at the crowd gathered in front of the LED screen discussing animatedly. An assistant stood behind him, reporting the real-time voting status.

"Currently, the instant noodle option is leading by a landslide, accounting for 68% of the total votes. Desserts are at 19%, and Mystery Bento is at 13%. Voting participation is very high, covering almost all departments."

Lee Soo-man took a sip of tea, his eyes narrowing behind his lenses: "That kid Jiang Zhiyu... he's very good at mobilizing emotions."

"Yes, from the visual impact of the poster to delegating the choice to all employees, and then using live seats as bait... he has completely captured the internal curiosity and sense of participation of the company," the assistant analyzed. "Moreover, the theme of 'instant noodles' seems simple and approachable, but in reality, it leaves massive room for manipulation, fitting his usual style of 'creating surprises within the ordinary.'"

Lee Soo-man smiled: "It seems this Saturday's live broadcast will be very lively."

He paused and added: "Notify the PR department to fully cooperate with the promotion and live broadcast of this show. Also, tell Jiang Zhiyu that while program effects are important, he should mind his limits and not actually break our artists."

"Yes."

Jiang Zhiyu's Production Room.

He sat in front of the computer, the screen displaying real-time voting data curves. The bar chart for the instant noodle option was soaring, already breaking 70%.

There was no expression on his face, but in the depths of his eyes, a glimmer of a successful plan flashed.

Instant noodles.

As expected.

This theme was grounded enough, had enough room for creativity, and was enough... for him to plant some "special" segments.

He opened another encrypted folder containing a detailed program schedule and design drawings for some "special props"—including but not limited to: instant noodle bowls that make weird noises, seasoning bottles that randomly spray sauce, aprons printed with "abstract emojis," and... the physical sample of that legendary "Golden Card."

His finger lightly tapped on the item: "Punishment Segment: Sasaeng Fan Performance in front of the SM Building."

Then, he picked up his phone and sent a message to the program PD:

[There's no suspense left in the voting. Prepare according to the final 'Instant Noodle War' plan. Ensure the 'Special Resource Pack' and 'Surprise Props' are in place by Friday. Also, add two hidden camera positions for the live broadcast; I want to capture the most authentic 'moments of breakdown.']

The PD replied quickly: [Understood. Producer Jiang, one question... the 'Reaper Hot Sauce' and 'Toothpaste Cream' in the 'Special Resource Pack'... are we really going to use them? Won't it be too much?]

[part:gemini-3.1-flash-lite]

Jiang Zhiyu replied: "Variety show effect. Besides, they can choose not to use it. The premise is... they can win normal resources in the scramble."

PD: "... Okay. (Silently lighting a candle for the performers)"

Jiang Zhiyu put down his phone and looked out the window.

On the giant LED screen, the poster for "Let's Do Battle, Chef Min!" was still eye-catching.

Saturday.

Soon.

Im Yoona, Bae Joo-hyun, the members of Red Velvet...

And, Lee Tima, the "former sister" who might be feeling smug somewhere in Suwon (although she won't come to the scene, Jiang Zhiyu is certain she will watch the live broadcast).

Get ready.

The first battle of the "SM Entertainment Weekend Special" —

Is about to begin.

And what kind of "earth-shattering" dish (and comedy) will this ramen theme, "personally" selected by all SM Entertainment staff, cook up?

Everyone is looking forward to it, or... waiting while shivering.

"SM Entertainment Weekend Special" Episode 1 — Live Scene · The Opening

Time: Saturday, 10:00 AM sharp

Location: The "Variety Kitchen" studio inside SM Entertainment

In the center of the huge circular studio, an open kitchen area full of cartoon vibes and variety show feel has been set up. The background consists of bright yellow walls, painted with giant ramen bowls, dancing chili peppers, and cartoon egg patterns. Two symmetrical cooking stations are placed on the left and right, with basic kitchenware (pots, bowls, ladles, basins, all brand new and brightly colored) already laid out, but the key ingredient area is still covered with a white cloth, full of suspense.

Behind the cooking stations is the guest preparation area, currently curtained off, with shadows vaguely visible moving about.

Multi-angle cameras are suspended from the ceiling, with mobile camera positions and jib arms on the sides. More than twenty staff members are performing their duties, debugging equipment, and confirming movement paths; the atmosphere is tense and orderly.

And all of this is being broadcast live to the entire internet through the official SM Entertainment channel and partner streaming platforms.

The moment the live signal cut in, what appeared in the center of the screen was not the expected gorgeous opening or the appearance of guests, but a close-up, almost face-to-camera, impeccable handsome face —

Jiang Zhiyu.

He is wearing a well-tailored dark gray casual suit with a simple white T-shirt underneath, his hair casually styled with texture, a few stray hairs resting on his forehead. At this moment, he is leaning in front of a handheld camera, his deep eyes looking straight at the audience through the screen, his eyelashes unfairly long.

He seems unaware that the live broadcast has already started, still focused on adjusting the camera angle, muttering to himself:

"Ciallo~~ (tentative greeting) Has the live broadcast started? Does this red light mean it's recording?"

He tilted his head, making a puzzled expression, his nose almost touching the lens.

The live comments exploded instantly:

[Ahhhhh! A critical hit right at the door! Is this face of Jiang Zhiyu real?!]

[What the heck is Ciallo, hahaha!]

[Why can he be so handsome even while filming so close to the camera?!]

[This angle... I'm dead...]

Jiang Zhiyu obviously didn't see the comments. He confirmed the red light was on, and a mischievous smile suddenly appeared on his face. He took half a step back, cleared his throat, and then —

He poked his cheeks with his index fingers, opened his eyes wide, pulled the corners of his mouth into an exaggerated arc, and said in a deliberately softened, sticky voice:

"Sunny Sunbae's aegyo attack~~ Is it like this? kiyo~~"

He even tilted his head and blinked.

The audience in front of the screen, especially those familiar with Girls Generation Sunny's signature "gummy smile" and aegyo skills, burst into laughter instantly!

[Holy crap! Jiang Zhiyu imitating Sunny! So similar! But why is it so funny!]

[Help! He's so bold! Will Sunny hunt him down if she sees this?!]

[This kiyo... I have goosebumps all over! But it's so cute!]

[Jiang Zhiyu: Idol image? What's that?]

Before the comments could recover, Jiang Zhiyu's expression changed. He quickly retracted his hands, the "cuteness" on his face vanished instantly, replaced by an expression of forced ferocity (but still lacking any deterrence). He raised his hands into claws at the sides of his face, wrinkled his nose, and lowered his voice:

"Next up is Ji-min (Karina)'s evil dragon roar~~ Roar~~"

He imitated the cute way Karina had mimicked a dinosaur on a variety show before, but coming from him, it looked more like a large feline trying to act fierce, with a strange contrast-cuteness.

The comments were another wave of [Hahahaha] and [Karina: Oppa, you wait!].

Immediately after, Jiang Zhiyu stood up straight, took a deep breath, and his expression suddenly became "affectionate" and "passionate." He placed one hand on his chest, looked up at a 45-degree angle toward... the studio ceiling light, and with his deep, pleasant voice, focused his energy and sang out —

"I——!"

It was the iconic high-pitched opening of Kim Taeyeon's "I", but he only dragged out one long note and stopped abruptly before reaching the high part, then quickly returned to a blank expression, as if the drama queen from a moment ago wasn't him.

The whole process was smooth and fluid, completely devoid of idol baggage, executing the "imitation of colleagues/seniors" in a way that was both audacious and subtly mastered the scale of "funny but not offensive."

The comments were already laughing like crazy:

[Is Jiang Zhiyu possessed by the God of Variety today?!]

[How many times has he watched everyone's variety clips in private!]

[I laughed so hard I crowed when he imitated Taeyeon Unnie's "I"!]

[It's over, my filter of him as a cold, sharp-tongued producer is shattered. He is now my source of happiness!]

[Where on earth did SM Entertainment dig up this treasure (crazy person) of a producer!]

Just then, a weak voice of a staff member came from off-screen, with suppressed laughter and a hint of helplessness:

"PD nim... the live broadcast has been going on for three minutes..."

Jiang Zhiyu's movements froze instantly.

He slowly turned his head to look in the direction of the sound, then slowly turned back to look at the camera lens with the red light on.

The expression on his face went from "having fun" to "blank confusion," then to "stiffness of realizing something," and finally settled on a subtle expression mixed with embarrassment, annoyance, and "forget it, let's just go with it."

He raised his hand, scratched his forehead with his finger, and gave a slightly helpless, yet somewhat "screw it", extremely authentic (and handsome) smile to the camera.

"Ah... it's already started." His tone returned to his usual calmness, but if one listened closely, one could hear a trace of unnaturalness. "Ahem, good morning, viewers. Welcome to the live scene of the 'SM Entertainment Weekend Special' episode 1 — 'Let's Do Battle, Chef Min!'"

He straightened his suit collar slightly, instantly switching back from "variety show imitator" to "professional producer/judge" mode, although his earlobes seemed to still have a hint of redness.

"I am the judge and rules commentator for this episode, Jiang Zhiyu." He nodded slightly to the camera. "Just now... was a little warm-up before the live broadcast started, and a tribute to the seniors who are about to appear. I hope Sunny Sunbae, Ji-min, and Taeyeon Sunbae won't hunt me down after seeing this."

He paused and added: "Of course, if you really want to hunt me down, please look for the SM Entertainment cafeteria; I usually haunt that place at meal times."

The comments were another wave of laughter: [Self-exposing your whereabouts, really?!] [Cafeteria: ??? What does that have to do with me?]

"Alright, enough small talk." Jiang Zhiyu turned and walked toward the center of the kitchen area. His back was straight, his pace steady, as if the previous embarrassment had never existed. "I believe everyone has already understood the theme of this episode through the posters and teasers. That's right, with the voting choice of all SM family members, our ultimate showdown theme today is —"

He walked to the central cooking station and ripped off the white cloth covering a certain area!

Whoosh —

What came into view was a mountain of ramen noodle cakes of various brands and flavors! Next to it were neatly arranged sauce packets, oil packets, and powder packets, dazzling to the eye.

"A classic national dish — Ramen!" Jiang Zhiyu raised his volume, waved his arm, "But today's ramen is definitely not ordinary! It will be an ultimate test of wisdom, strategy, variety sense, teamwork, and... a little bit of luck!"

His voice was clearly transmitted through the microphone, carrying a provocative passion.

"Now, let us use the most enthusiastic applause and anticipation —" Jiang Zhiyu turned to the side, pointing toward the guest preparation area, "Welcome the 'Chef Mins' of this episode!"

The passionate background music started, and the lights focused on the curtains of the preparation area.

The curtains slowly opened.

The first to walk out was Im Yoona.

Her styling today completely subverted her usual elegant and pure image — a long ponytail tied high, revealing her smooth forehead and beautiful neck lines. She was wearing a modified white chef's uniform, tailored to be slim and neat, with an apron printed with small ramen patterns tied around her waist. She had slightly heavier stage makeup on than usual, her eyes were bright, and her signature sweet smile hung on the corner of her mouth, but if one looked closely, there was a hint of eagerness to fight in that smile. She was even holding a... golden spatula (prop) in her hand.

[Yoona! So handsome!]

[I can handle this chef outfit!]

[Is the spatula for real, hahaha!]

Immediately after, the five members of Red Velvet walked out one by one.

Bae Joo-hyun (Irene) was also wearing a white chef's uniform, but her style was simpler and cooler, and her apron was light blue, printed with delicate snowflake patterns. Her long hair draped softly over her shoulders, her makeup was exquisite, and she still had that calm and elegant appearance, only what she was holding in her hand was not a kitchen utensil, but a thick book titled "One Hundred Philosophies of Ramen" (homemade prop book). The temperament formed a strange contrast with the scene.

Kang Seulgi's chef uniform was a size too big, the cuffs rolled up, making her look silly and serious. She wore a cute chef's hat (with a little bear pattern on it), her apron was covered with various small animals and hearts, and she was holding a giant frying pan (prop) with the words "Bear Power" printed on it, with an expression of "ferocity" (effect: even sillier).

Park Sooyoung (Joy) was full of energy, her chef uniform was pink! The apron was painted with a huge smiley face and chili peppers, her ponytail was tied high, and the tips of her hair were dyed a touch of pink. She was swinging a long... soft rubber chili pepper-shaped "whip" (prop) in her hand, her smile was dazzlingly bright, and as soon as she came out, she made a heart gesture to the camera: "Hi! Everyone! Are you ready to welcome Chef Joy's flame cuisine?"

Wendy (Son Seung-wan) was wearing a standard chef's uniform, wearing black-rimmed glasses (no lenses), her expression was serious and professional, holding a notebook and a pen, as if she wasn't here to participate in a variety show, but to attend an academic seminar. Her apron was printed with a mixed pattern of musical notes and chemical formulas.

Kim Yerim (Yeri), as the maknae, was dressed the most "ostentatiously." Her chef uniform was bright yellow, her apron was covered with words like "maknae ON TOP," "God of Ramen," "Yeri World," etc., and was covered with sequins. She had a hair clip shaped like a mini ramen bowl on her head, holding a toy trumpet, and as soon as she came out, she blew it twice and made faces at the camera.

The six "chefs" stood in a row in front of the cooking station, facing the camera and the few audience members on site (mainly staff and lucky employees who were drawn), with different styles, but all full of variety show sense and dedication.

Jiang Zhiyu stood opposite them, his eyes sweeping over the six faces, some sweet, some cold, some lively, some serious, and a formulaic smile curled up at the corner of his mouth.

"Welcome, 'chefs'. It seems everyone has made sufficient... styling preparations for today's showdown." He paused, "However, for a cooking showdown, styling alone is not enough."

His eyes became sharp.

"Before we officially start, I need to emphasize the core rules of this episode again —"

"Everything, for the sake of the ultimate ramen."

"Means are allowed within the rules."

"Victory or defeat will determine the ownership of glory and 'public execution'."

He picked up a remote control and pressed it.

On the big screen behind him, a simplified flowchart of the rules appeared, as well as a close-up of the "abstract emoticon mask" that people both love and fear, and the golden "Golden Card".

[part:gemini-3.0-flash]

"Well then," Jiang Zhiyu put down the remote control, resting both hands on the central prep station. He leaned forward slightly, his gaze sweeping slowly across each "chef's" face like a hawk scanning its prey.

"I announce—"

"'SM Entertainment Weekend Special' Episode One: 'Battle of the Chef Mins!'—"

"Starts officially, now!"

The moment the words left his mouth, the background music abruptly became tense and rhythmic.

The live stream screen split in two: one half showed a wide shot, while the other began rapidly cutting to close-ups of the six "chefs'" expressions: Im Yoona's eagerness, Bae Joo-hyun's calm observation, Kang Seulgi's simple-minded nervousness, Joy's flamboyant excitement, Wendy's serious analysis, and Yeri's mischievous curiosity.

And on the edge of the frame was Jiang Zhiyu's handsome face, which had returned to a calm, expressionless state that nonetheless exerted a heavy pressure.

The Instant Noodle War was on the verge of breaking out.

The bullet chat boiled over completely:

[It's here, it's here! It's finally starting!]

[This lineup! This setting! I'll bet fifty cents that we're getting a legendary scene today!]

[The contrast between Jiang Zhiyu's imitation just now and his serious look now is so jarring and hilarious!]

[Yoona and RV fighting!]

[I've already started looking forward to the punishment segment (sorry to all the beauties)]

[Jiang Zhiyu, please begin your performance (torture)!]

Trash Talk Segment—The Clash of Gunpowder and Variety Sense

As Jiang Zhiyu finished speaking, the stirring background music didn't stop; instead, it added drumbeats similar to a boxing match intro. The lights also suddenly focused on the "confrontation zone" between the two central prep stations.

He picked up a wireless microphone and walked slowly toward the six "head chefs," a subtle smile on his face that sat somewhere between a "professional referee" and someone "waiting for a good show."

"Before the real 'culinary slaughter' begins, according to international convention—" Jiang Zhiyu drawled, his gaze sweeping over Im Yoona and the five members of Red Velvet, "we need a little 'emotional warm-up'."

He snapped his fingers (the movement was very cool, prompting a wave of [awsl] in the chat), and the large screen behind him immediately switched to an interface resembling a sports tournament bracket. On the left was [Im Yoona Team] (TBD), on the right was [Red Velvet Team] (TBD), and a large flashing 'VS' sat in the middle.

"That's right, the trash talk segment." Jiang Zhiyu's tone was flat, but his eyes sparkled. "The goal is to heat up the atmosphere, show your determination, and... as much as the rules allow, mentally crush your opponents."

He turned to the six female artists, the curve of his mouth deepening. "Of course, as a civilized, harmonious variety show full of SM Family love, our trash talk must follow these principles: First, no personal attacks; second, no involving privacy; third, it must be creative; fourth, it must be—ruthless enough."

"Now," he took a step back, clearing the central area completely and making a "please" gesture, "the groupings haven't been decided yet, but you can show off your momentum first. Who's going first? Throw some trash talk at your opponent (or potential opponent)."

The scene fell silent for a brief second.

Then, Yeri was the first to jump out, blowing a "beep beep" on a small horn in her hand as she stood in the center with full momentum. She first made a face at the camera, then put her hands on her hips and tilted her chin up, opening fire with her clear, slightly fierce "baby-voice."

"Red Velvet senior Unnies! And Yoona Unnie!" She intentionally emphasized the words "Senior" and "Unnie." "Even though I'm the youngest, today, I, Kim Yerim, will prove that the maknae is the team's hidden ace! My 'Yeri World Ramen' will be a legendary dish that subverts your perception of taste! Just wait, that Gold Card is mine! And—" She suddenly turned to Jiang Zhiyu, pointing her little finger at him, "Zhiyu Oppa! Don't think you can do whatever you want just because you're the referee! I definitely won't drink any more weird water today!"

After speaking, she gave a "hmpf," and retreated to the line with her head held high and a proud expression.

Bullet chat: [Yeri is so brave!] [maknae on top!] [She actually still remembers the saltwater grudge hahaha!]

Jiang Zhiyu remained unfazed, even nodding. "Very good, very spirited. Next?"

Joy immediately bounced out, snapping a soft rubber chili whip (a silent prop). Her face wore a smile so bright it was dazzling, but her words weren't polite at all:

"Yeri-ya, dreams are beautiful, but reality is cruel~" she drawled. "Today, let Joy Unnie teach you what 'the cruelty of variety' means! My 'Flaming Joy Ramen' will burn your perception of ramen to ashes! Yoona Unnie, I know you're smart, but cooking isn't something you can win with just your face and acting skills, you know?" She winked at Im Yoona, her tone intimate but her words hiding an edge. "As for Referee Jiang Zhiyu—" She turned to him, her smile unchanging, "Please be sure to be fair and just, or my chili whip might accidentally swing toward the referee's table~"

Bullet chat: [Joy is so spicy!] [I love this provocation!] [Jiang Zhiyu: The referee's table is in danger?]

Hearing this, the sweet smile on Im Yoona's face didn't change at all; instead, it grew even more radiant. She stepped forward elegantly and stood still. First, she smoothed down non-existent sleeves (she was wearing a short-sleeved chef's uniform), then she put her hands behind her back and tilted her head slightly, speaking slowly in her voice that could kill with sweetness:

"Joy-ya, my acting skills might indeed not be of much help for cooking ramen." She paused, her eyes suddenly becoming sharp and cunning, like a beautiful fox that had spotted its prey. "But, my observation skills, reaction speed, and—experience in pranking people, have been tested by years of actual combat."

Her gaze swept over the entire Red Velvet team, lingering a moment longer on Bae Joo-hyun's face, her tone still gentle. "RV kids, Unnie loves you very much, but today, I'm sorry. Unnie wants to play with that Gold Card too. For instance... ordering a certain referee to experience the feeling of an 'Emoji Headgear'?" She looked at Jiang Zhiyu with a beaming smile.

Jiang Zhiyu's brow twitched slightly, but he didn't speak.

Bullet chat: [Yoona has made her move!] [Experience in pranking people hahahaha!] [Is she hinting at Jiang Zhiyu?!]

Wendy pushed up her "black-rimmed glasses" and stood out with a serious face. "Yoona Unnie, Joy, Yeri, variety sense is important, but the cooking itself is more crucial. I've studied the chemical composition of ramen, the optimal cooking time, and the golden ratio of the seasoning packets. Today, I will use science and data to create an impeccable 'Gestalt Ramen'. Any flashy interference is futile in the face of absolute perfection." Her tone was certain, carrying the pride of an academic.

Kang Seulgi, holding her "Bear Power" frying pan, spoke simply. "I... I'll work hard! My 'Bear Vitality Ramen' definitely won't lose! Although I might not be very good at talking... but!" She suddenly raised the frying pan with force, trying to make a fierce expression (effect: like a ruffled little bear), "If anyone dares to steal my ingredients, I-I'll use this pan... to protect them!"

Bullet chat: [Seulgi is so cute!] [Protecting the ingredients!] [What kind of trash talk is that haha!]

Now, only Bae Joo-hyun had yet to speak. Everyone's eyes, including Jiang Zhiyu's, fell on her.

Bae Joo-hyun stood there quietly. Under the variety show lights, her cool features seemed to come with a built-in frost filter. She gently closed the book in her hand, "One Hundred Philosophies of Ramen" (a prop), and looked up. Her gaze was calm as it looked across—first at Im Yoona, then at her own members, and finally, it landed on Jiang Zhiyu's face.

Her voice wasn't loud, but it was clear and pleasant, carrying a unique, calm penetration.

"Victory or defeat in words is meaningless." She spoke, her tone flat and waveless. "Whether it's ramen or a game, what ultimately determines the result is strength, strategy, and... focus that isn't shaken by external things."

She paused, her gaze sweeping over the mountain of ramen bricks in the center and the "special resources" covered with white cloths, then looked back at Jiang Zhiyu. "The referee-nim designed complex rules and prepared unknown challenges, simply because he wants to see chaos, panic, and... loss of control."

The corner of her mouth curved up almost imperceptibly, and in her cool eyes, a very faint, almost provocative light seemed to flash.

"But, unfortunately."

"Today, I'm afraid you won't see what you want to see."

After speaking, she gave a slight nod and said no more. But that sentence, "I'm afraid you won't see what you want to see," combined with her usual calm expression, carried more weight than any exaggerated trash talk.

The bullet chat exploded instantly:

[Irene! Queen's speech!]

['I'm afraid you won't see what you want to see'—is this a direct declaration of war against Jiang Zhiyu?!]

[Calm Analysis Emperor VS Troublemaking Referee! This sense of confrontation!]

[Sister Bae: I'll just quietly watch you act up.]

[Did Jiang Zhiyu's expression change? Camera, zoom in on his face!]

The camera immediately cut to a close-up of Jiang Zhiyu.

The formulaic smile on his face froze for an imperceptible half-second when he heard Bae Joo-hyun's last sentence. Those eyes, always deep and calm, darkened suddenly as if something heavier and sharper surged through them, but it was quickly and perfectly suppressed.

He raised his hands and clapped softly.

"Clap, clap, clap."

The applause was exceptionally clear in the suddenly quiet studio.

"Very wonderful," Jiang Zhiyu spoke, his voice steady, revealing no emotion. "We have the maknae's 'newborn calf' fearlessness, the fire declaration of the energetic type, the scientific crushing of the intellectual type, the simple-minded determination of the protector, the composed threat of the experienced one, and..."

His gaze finally fixed on Bae Joo-hyun's face, lingering for two seconds before slowly moving away.

"...the absolute confidence of the calm one." He summarized, "The atmosphere is already hot enough; it's even a bit scalding."

He put down the microphone, walked to the central control console, and picked up a small box covered with a red cloth.

"Now then, moving on to the next segment—"

"The Grouping of Fate!"

He showed the small box to the camera and everyone.

"Inside are six small balls in three colors, two of each color. Those who draw the same color will be teammates." Jiang Zhiyu shook the box. "The grouping is completely random. Your teammate might be a member you spend every day with, or it might be... a senior or junior you 'love to hate'."

"Friendship, chemistry, team honor, versus sudden combinations and unknown adjustments—which will bring victory?" Jiang Zhiyu placed the box on the central prep station and pulled off the red cloth, revealing a transparent lottery box where the six colored balls were clearly visible. "The answer is about to be revealed."

"Who's first?" He looked at the six of them.

The smoke from the trash talk had yet to dissipate before the suspense of the fated grouping rose again.

The atmosphere in the live stream room was completely ignited.

The showdown had escalated on all fronts, from words to teamwork.

And as Jiang Zhiyu looked at the lottery box, deep in his eyes, that cold, calculating light flashed once more.

Random?

Perhaps.

But games always need some 'accidental' drama, don't they?