364: Chapter 340 I Don't Want to Go to Work

Chaos completely erupted in the guesthouse.

The first to suffer was Muscle SpongeBob.

Cho Mi Yeon was holding that bowl of Sea-Nutty-Bar, and she was supposed to accept the punishment obediently—according to the rules, the Fast Command Team had lost this round again, and the naughty kids operation team needed to send a representative to eat this bizarre food. Kim Minnie was already prepared to sacrifice herself and took a step forward with her eyes closed.

But Song Yuqi suddenly reached out and stopped her.

“Wait.” She blinked, an innocent smile appearing on her face, “Let me do it.”

Then she took the bowl of Sea-Nutty-Bar and turned toward Muscle SpongeBob, her steps light as if she were dancing.

Muscle SpongeBob was standing with its hands on its hips, its two large front teeth gleaming in the sunlight, waiting to see the naughty kids operation team make fools of themselves. It even struck a bodybuilding pose, preparing to celebrate its victory.

“Oops—”

As Song Yuqi walked up to it, her foot slipped, and her whole body lunged forward, precisely dumping the bowl's contents onto SpongeBob SquarePants's square face.

Green matcha pudding smeared all over its face, octopus tentacles hung from its front teeth, that edible plastic eyeball stuck right over its left eye, and the radish-carved skull rolled into its collar.

The entire place went silent.

Muscle SpongeBob froze in place, the green mush dripping down its face and onto its muscular yellow sponge body.

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!!!” Song Yuqi pressed her palms together, her expression so sincere she could have run for an Oscar, “I accidentally slipped! I really didn't do it on purpose!”

The corners of her eyes were clearly smiling.

Beside her, Ye Shuhua held up her phone, the camera steadily capturing the scene while she provided narration: “A brilliant moment, worth recording.”

Cho Mi Yeon covered her mouth, her shoulders shaking.

Kim Minnie had buried her face in Xu Suizhen's shoulder, her whole body trembling like a leaf.

Jeon Soyeon stood at the back with a serious expression, but if one looked closely, they would see the corners of her mouth twitching frantically.

Muscle SpongeBob slowly raised a hand, wiped the green mush off its face, looked at the slimy glob in its hand, and then looked at the innocent-faced Song Yuqi in front of it.

“You—”

“I really didn't mean to!” Song Yuqi spoke first, palms together, eyes blinking and lashes fluttering, “SpongeBob-xi, you won't be angry, right? You're so magnanimous, so kind, so—strong!”

She said the last two words with great force, giving a thumbs up.

Muscle SpongeBob was stunned.

The anger it had prepared was blocked by this string of flattery, stuck in its chest, making its square face turn red (though it was hard to tell).

Beside it, Patrick Star stood with his mouth agape, looking at Song Yuqi and then at SpongeBob, his brain clearly failing to process the situation.

“She... she said she didn't mean it...” Patrick Star spoke up foolishly, “Then... are you still angry?”

SpongeBob: “...”

It took a deep breath, trying to maintain its bully's dignity, and said in that squeaky voice: “...Don't let it happen again.”

Song Yuqi smiled like a flower: “Okay, okay! Definitely!”

She turned to walk back, and as she passed Ye Shuhua, the two exchanged a knowing look.

Plan successful.

First blood, taken.

Patrick Star was the second one.

It happened so fast that no one had time to react.

At the time, Patrick Star was standing in the middle of the living room, waiting for the next round of the game to start. He was wearing his signature green trunks with his hands on his hips and a silly smile on his face, looking completely off guard.

Ye Shuhua “accidentally” passed by him.

It was truly “accidental.”

Her foot suddenly tripped, her whole body stumbled forward, and her hands flailed wildly in the air—then precisely grabbed the edge of Patrick Star's trunks.

“Oops—!!!”

She cried out, her body losing balance, and her hand pulled downward with the momentum.

“Rippp—”

Patrick Star's trunks were pulled halfway down, revealing the floral-print underwear underneath.

The room fell into a deathly silence once again.

And then—

“Pfft—!!!”

Someone couldn't hold it in first, and laughter gushed out like a floodgate opening.

Patrick Star frantically pulled up his pants, his pink face (if he had one) turning a deep shade of crimson as he pointed at Ye Shuhua, too angry to speak: “You, you, you, you—”

Ye Shuhua had already scrambled up from the floor, palms together with an innocent face: “I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I really didn't mean to! The floor was too slippery! I promise!”

As she spoke, she even rubbed the floor with her foot as if to verify her claim.

Patrick Star looked at the floor—clean, dry, without a single water stain.

He looked back at Ye Shuhua.

Ye Shuhua blinked her eyes, her expression as sincere as could be.

Patrick Star's brain wasn't very sharp to begin with, and now it had completely stalled. He opened his mouth, making several meaningless sounds, before finally turning to the directing team in the distance to complain with his eyes.

Jiang Zhiyu sat behind the monitor, holding a cup of sweet soy milk. Watching this scene, the corners of his mouth curled up slightly.

Lee Tima was jumping up and down beside him: “She was definitely doing it on purpose! Definitely!”

Jiang Zhiyu slowly took a sip of soy milk: “Where's the evidence?”

Lee Tima: “...”

“Without evidence, it's just an accident.” Jiang Zhiyu's tone was as calm as a weather forecast, “It's a variety show; accidents are normal.”

Lee Tima glared at him with an expression that said, “Whose side are you on anyway?”

Jiang Zhiyu looked back at her innocently, his gaze clearly saying: I'm on the audience's side.

Lee Tima took a deep breath and decided to take matters into her own hands.

She stood up and strode toward the filming area, prepared to keep a hawk-like eye on this group of rebellious naughty kids.

But she didn't notice a pair of eyes quietly watching her back.

Kim Minnie.

This member, who usually had the weakest presence, spoke the least, and was most easily overlooked, was now quietly slipping through the kitchen's back door in a manner completely different from her usual self.

In the kitchen, the staff were preparing the ingredients for the next round.

Kim Minnie's gaze swept across the counter, finally landing on a small bottle.

Wasabi paste.

It was leftover from the sashimi at lunch, a small tube with green paste lying quietly inside, waiting for the next unlucky person.

Kim Minnie reached out and quietly tucked that tube of wasabi into her sleeve.

Her movements were light and silent.

Then she walked out of the kitchen as if nothing had happened and blended into the crowd.

Lee Tima was standing in front of Song Yuqi, hands on her hips, trying to maintain a serious expression.

“Song Yuqi-xi, about that ‘accident’ just now—”

“It really was an accident!” Song Yuqi spoke first, her expression so sincere it was impossible to doubt, “Tima, don't you believe me? We have such a good relationship, why would I lie to you?”

Lee Tima stared at her, trying to find a flaw in that face.

Song Yuqi smiled gently and harmlessly, her eyes curving into crescents, her whole being radiating an “I am a good person” aura.

Lee Tima narrowed her eyes.

Something was wrong.

Something was very wrong.

But before she could continue her questioning, a sudden cry came from behind her.

“Oops—!!!”

It was Kim Minnie's voice.

Lee Tima instinctively turned around—

A finger was thrust directly into her mouth.

That finger was coated with a thick, emerald green, pungent-smelling—

Wasabi paste.

Time seemed to freeze for 0.3 seconds.

And then—

“Mmph—!!!”

Lee Tima's eyes instantly widened, her pupils contracting violently as a spiciness strong enough to make one ascend to heaven rushed from the tip of her tongue to her brain, through her nasal cavity, and straight to the top of her head.

That feeling was like ten thousand ants having a party in her nose at once, or having her nose washed with chili water, or—she couldn't describe it because her brain had already short-circuited.

Kim Minnie withdrew her finger, looking panicked: “I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I wanted to call you, but my hand slipped—”

Before she could finish, Lee Tima had already started crying.

Truly crying.

The power of the wasabi was too intense; her tears flowed like an open faucet, her nose was blocked, she had trouble breathing, and she was hopping in place like a cat that had its tail stepped on.

“Water—! Water—!!!” she shouted while flailing her arms, her voice cracking.

Just then, a hand reached out from the side, handing her a bowl.

“It's okay, here, drink this quickly.”

It was Jeon Soyeon's voice, gentle, concerned, and full of sisterly love.

Lee Tima didn't even have time to see what was in the bowl; she took it and gulped it down.

“Glug— glug—”

The moment the liquid entered her mouth, her brain short-circuited again.

Sour.

Extremely sour.

That kind of sour wasn't the refreshing sourness of lemonade, but—

Cho Mi Yeon spoke up faintly from the side, "Freshly squeezed lemonade, the undiluted version."

Lee Tima froze in place, that mouthful of one hundred percent pure lemon juice held in her mouth; she couldn't swallow it, nor could she spit it out.

Her tears flowed even more fiercely.

The physiological tears, combined with the irritation of the wasabi and the sour punch of the lemon, made her look as if she had just experienced the greatest tragedy of her life.

"Lemonade is rich in Vitamin C," Xu Suizhen walked over, her expression still calm, her tone carrying just the right amount of concern. "We're doing this out of concern for your health, Tima."

Lee Tima finally swallowed that mouthful of lemonade.

She opened her mouth, wanting to say something, but could only produce meaningless syllables: "Wu... ah... ssi..."

Her tongue was numb, her nose was blocked, her eyes were still tearing up, and her entire being looked pathetic to the extreme.

"How beautiful!"

A cheerful voice rang out.

Lee Tima snapped her head around to find Ye Shuhua holding up a phone, lens aimed at her, with the kind of brilliant smile that made one want to hit someone.

"Shuhua Unnie, you're not allowed to film—!!!"

Lee Tima lunged forward with flailing limbs, but Ye Shuhua nimbly dodged. The phone remained steadily pointed at her, even adjusting the angle slightly.

"This expression is too precious! It must be saved!" Ye Shuhua said while running, her voice laced with laughter.

Lee Tima chased for a few steps, but her tongue was too numb to speak and her nose was so blocked she could hardly breathe; she simply couldn't catch up.

She could only stand there, watching Ye Shuhua run laps around the living room, the phone lens always on her, shouting "Classic shot, classic shot!"

Nearby, Song Yuqi and Cho Mi Yeon were already doubled over in laughter, supporting each other just to keep from falling down.

Kim Minnie stood in a corner with her head down, her shoulders shaking—she was clearly holding back laughter.

Xu Suizhen remained expressionless, but if one looked closely, fine smile lines could be seen at the corners of her eyes.

Jeon Soyeon was the most composed and didn't laugh out loud, but the corners of her mouth were turned up to her ears, impossible to suppress.

The Bikini Bottom Bullies stood on the other side watching the chaos, looking at each other in bewilderment.

Patrick Star's brain was still lagging, not understanding what had just happened.

The green paste on Muscle SpongeBob's face hadn't been wiped clean yet, making him look even more ridiculous at this moment.

Mechanical Mr. Krabs' claws went "click-clack" twice, as if expressing confusion.

Karate Sandy maintained a vigilant stance, but her eyes also betrayed her confusion.

Glass-domed Plankton hopped inside his glass case, his robot body spinning once as if scanning the chaotic scene.

"You guys—!" Lee Tima finally regained a bit of her speaking ability and pointed at the six girls who were doubled over with laughter, her voice hoarse, "You guys are—cheating!!!"

Song Yuqi lifted her head from Cho Mi Yeon's shoulder, wiped away the tears from laughing, put her hands on her hips, and asked back righteously:

"Cheating? Show us the evidence of cheating!"

"You intentionally pushed the Sea-Nutty-Bar onto SpongeBob!"

"Where's the evidence?" Song Yuqi blinked. "I accidentally slipped. There's surveillance footage as proof—right, Director?"

Everyone looked in unison at Jiang Zhiyu behind the monitor.

Jiang Zhiyu held his sweet soy milk, took a leisurely sip, and then nodded. "Hmm, it did look like an accident."

Lee Tima's eyes widened: "Oppa!!!"

Jiang Zhiyu looked back at her innocently, his eyes clearly saying: I'm just stating the facts.

"Then you pulled Patrick Star's pants!"

"I accidentally tripped!" Ye Shuhua raised her hand, her expression sincere. "The floor was too slippery, I promise—right, Director?"

Jiang Zhiyu nodded again: "Indeed, that area of the floor was just waxed yesterday."

Lee Tima: "..."

"Then—then she stuffed wasabi into my mouth!"

"My hand just slipped by accident!" Kim Minnie finally looked up, her face still carrying an unhidden smile. "I wanted to call out to you, Tima, but then my hand wasn't steady..."

"Then you poured lemonade down my throat!"

Jeon Soyeon took over the conversation, her tone as calm as a weather forecast: "We were concerned about you. The wasabi was too spicy, so drinking some lemonade can help neutralize it—right, Director?"

Jiang Zhiyu was silent for a second.

In that second, everyone's gaze was focused on him.

Lee Tima's eyes were filled with the sentiment of "Oppa, if you dare to nod, I'm cutting off our sibling relationship."

The eyes of the six (G)I-DLE members were filled with "Director, you must be fair, just, and open."

Jiang Zhiyu looked at Lee Tima on the left, then at the six girls on the right, and finally spoke slowly:

"From the perspective of variety show effect..."

He paused.

Everyone held their breath.

—"It really did look quite good."

Lee Tima: "...!!!"

The six (G)I-DLE members: "...Yay!!!"

The Bikini Bottom Bullies collectively fell into silence.

Muscle SpongeBob finally wiped the green paste off its face, but that plastic eyeball was still hanging from its front teeth, swaying back and forth. It looked at the chaotic scene before it, then at those girls who were laughing like flowers, and suddenly a terrifying thought occurred to it:

These naughty kids didn't come here to compete at all.

They came here to cause trouble.

Patrick Star finally recovered from his lag and pointed at Ye Shuhua, his voice filled with grievance: "She pulled my pants!"

Ye Shuhua blinked innocently: "I apologized, didn't I?"

"You—you—"

"And," Ye Shuhua added, "the quality of your pants really isn't that great. Should you consider switching brands? I can recommend a few."

Patrick Star: "...???"

Mechanical Mr. Krabs' claws "clicked and clacked" even faster, as if saying "This batch of naughty kids is too hard to manage."

Karate Sandy dropped her vigilant stance and silently watched the farce, thinking: I'm here to compete, not to watch a comedy.

Glass-domed Plankton spun around in his glass case, his robot body holding up a sign that read: [Humans are too terrifying, I want to go back to Bikini Bottom]

Lee Tima stood in place, the double stimulation of wasabi and lemon still throwing a party on her taste buds. Tears were still flowing, her nose was still blocked, and her tongue was still numb.

She looked at those heartlessly laughing (G)I-DLE members, then at her calm biological brother holding the sweet soy milk, and suddenly realized a terrifying fact:

She had been set up.

No, not just set up, she was—

Targeted by the whole group.

"You guys—" she pointed a finger at the six of them, her voice hoarse, "Just you wait—!!!"

Song Yuqi laughed even harder: "Wait for what? Wait for you to pay us our wages?"

Cho Mi Yeon chimed in: "Tima, aren't you the screenwriter? You should be the one paying us."

Ye Shuhua leaned in with her phone: "Come, come, say 'just you wait' one more time. Make the expression a bit more fierce; the lighting at this angle is especially good."

Lee Tima lunged at the lens with flailing limbs: "Shuhua Unnie—!!!"

Ye Shuhua laughed and ran away, shouting as she ran, "Classic expression! Saved!"

A burst of laughter erupted in the living room once again.

Jeon Soyeon finally couldn't hold it in and started laughing as well, her shoulders shaking.

Kim Minnie laughed so hard she crouched on the floor, hugging her knees, her whole body shaking in a heap.

Xu Suizhen still looked expressionless, but if one looked closely, there were tears in the corners of her eyes—from laughing.

The Bikini Bottom Bullies completely gave up on thinking, standing in a row, silently watching this civil war among humans.

The plastic eyeball on Muscle SpongeBob's front tooth swayed with its breathing, as if witnessing history.

In the distance, Jiang Zhiyu put down his sweet soy milk, picked up the walkie-talkie, and said softly:

"Cameramen, film everything."

"Don't miss a single shot."

"The title for this episode will be—"

He paused, the corners of his mouth turning up slightly:

"Naughty Kids' Counterattack: Screenwriter Suffers Collective Gang-up."

The sound of a cameraman stifling a laugh came through the walkie-talkie: "Copy that."

On the monitor screen, Lee Tima was still chasing Ye Shuhua. Song Yuqi and Cho Mi Yeon were cheering from the side, Kim Minnie was laughing so hard she couldn't get up from the floor, while Jeon Soyeon and Xu Suizhen stood to the side, one laughing reservedly and the other laughing covertly.

The chaos continued.

Laughter echoed.

And this 'naughty kids operation' had finally reached its most exciting climax.

—Or rather, it had only just begun.