246: Chapter 247 Cultural Export: Teaching Aliens to Sing "Good Luck"

"Cut!"

Jiang Chen casually turned off the tipping function in the livestream room.

Looking at the screen filled with dense rows of spirit stones, rare metals, and mineral vein transfer agreements, he felt exceptionally good.

Compared to colonizing those vicious enemies, this feeling of fleecing interstellar civilizations until they have nothing left is the true enjoyment.

He turned his head and looked at the alien envoys behind him.

Some looked like giant slimes, some were covered in eyes, and a few were clumsily using tentacles to hold chopsticks, trying to pick up the last piece of sweet and sour pork tenderloin on the plate.

"Ahem."

Jiang Chen cleared his throat, his eyes becoming unfathomable. "Everyone, business is about long-term relationships."

"You bought my spicy strips, you ate my hot pot."

"We are not just trade partners now, but friends."

"Since we are friends, I cannot hold back."

He waved to Ikaros behind him. "Go, bring that loudspeaker over, and prepare a few holographic projectors."

"Today, I want to teach everyone a 'brainwashing hit song' from our God Realm."

"As long as you learn it, I guarantee that when you go out on expeditions in the future, whether it is fighting wars or mining, your luck... will absolutely explode!"

The alien envoys looked at each other.

That slime creature made a gurgling sound. Although it could not be understood, judging by the excited light jumping on its body, it was clearly saying:

"A song from the God Realm? Must learn it!"

"I knew it, if it is produced by God Jiang, it must be a masterpiece!"

"Quick! Take out the recorders! We must record it and bring it back to worship!"

Jiang Chen did not waste words and turned on the speakers.

"Fold a paper crane, then tie a red ribbon..."

That familiar, festive, and even slightly rustic melody instantly pierced through the alloy walls of the base, seeming to stir up a layer of joyful ripples in the vacuum of space.

Jiang Chen swayed his waist, his movements exaggerated and standard, even carrying a bit of the essence of a square-dancing auntie.

"This is called 'Good Luck Comes'."

While keeping the rhythm, Jiang Chen shouted to the livestream camera: "Come on! Sing with me!"

"Fold a paper crane... then tie a red ribbon..."

"May kind people have good luck every day!"

In the livestream room, the netizens of the Dragon Kingdom were completely dumbfounded.

[Holy shit! God Jiang, what are you doing?!]

[What kind of underworld operation is this? Teaching aliens to sing 'Good Luck Comes'?]

[Did I hear that right? That tentacle monster with eight eyes is actually learning Chinese?]

[God Jiang: Although you are alien races, as long as you sing this song, you will be the interstellar allies of our Dragon Kingdom from now on!]

It was not just the netizens.

At this moment, in those alien spaceships waiting in line to trade, Commanders of various civilizations were staring at their screens, sweating profusely.

Although they did not understand the meaning of the song's lyrics, that cheerful, impassioned, and metaphysical fluctuation filled with something called "auspiciousness" actually caused a strange chemical reaction in their long-dormant logic circuits.

"Listen to this melody!"

The Commander of Sirius trembled with excitement, tentacles flailing. "Although I do not understand what it is singing, I can feel... a kind of 'auspiciousness'... from the depths of my soul?"

"That is the taste of good luck!"

"Quick! Sing along! Engrave that 'Good Luck Comes' on the bridge control console for me!"

Thus, an extremely bizarre scene appeared.

In this cold, deep space, dozens of strange-looking alien spaceships, which usually fought until they bled when they met, were now lined up in neat formation, swaying their tentacles or limbs along with the deafening gongs and drums of "Good Luck Comes".

The scene was so spectacular that it made Zhao Gang in the base doubt his life.

"Boss, is this really scientific?"

Zhao Gang wiped the cold sweat from his forehead. "The laser cannons on these spaceships were still smoking just now, why now..."

"This is called spiritual and cultural exchange."

Jiang Chen handed the microphone to that alien Commander who looked like snot.

That guy actually opened its lipless mouthparts and tried hard to imitate the pronunciation: "hao... yun... lai..."

When it reached the climax, it even performed an extremely clumsy Yangge dance.

"Look." Jiang Chen watched this scene, a hint of triumphant cunning flashing in his eyes.

"Although the song is out of tune and the dance is a disaster."

"But as long as this song rings out in the Milky Way Galaxy."

"In the future, those higher civilizations, whoever wants to mess with us, will have to think twice."

"After all, who would be willing to offend a... bizarre civilization that even led aliens astray?"

Academician Chen Shuyin stood behind, watching Jiang Chen's "God Jiang is fooling the whole world again" expression, sighing helplessly, but the smile at the corner of her mouth could not be suppressed.

What civilization games, what cosmic laws.

With Jiang Chen, it all ended up as "eat well, drink well, and sing 'Good Luck Comes'."

This is probably the true, unparalleled—dimensional reduction suppression.

"What about the next target?" Academician Chen Shuyin asked.

"No rush." Jiang Chen looked at the alien fleets constantly gathering outside the window, a playful smile curling at the corner of his mouth. "Since these guys are so polite, we must also show some hospitality."

"Let them line up and leave all the specialties they brought this time here."

"I am going to host an 'interstellar communal meal' later."

"Let's continue the music, continue the dance!"

At this moment.

On the other side of the distant star sector, that scout team of The Sweepers that had been scared away, after receiving this cheerful "Good Luck Comes" signal, did not even have the courage to turn their ships around.

They had originally thought this was just a routine "cleanup mission".

As a result, not only did they run into mice that could chew up warships, but they also encountered a monster that could vaporize a base in an instant, and now... it was even crazily torturing their auditory systems there?

"Crazy! Everyone is crazy!" In the command center of The Sweepers' spaceship, the AI main brain named "Eye of Destruction", because of parsing this melody full of "good luck", directly caused its core program to crash.

It frantically sent the last telegram to headquarters:

"The natives of the Solar System are holding some kind of... 'bizarre ritual' that is enough to pollute cognition and even induce collective mental derangement!"

"Their weapons can ignore mass, their pets can devour dark matter, and their music can destroy logic."

"This is not a civilization."

"This is the universe's biggest—bug!"

"It is recommended to immediately blockade this star system, forever! Never, ever go and provoke those guys again!!!"

With this desperate warning sent out, the vanguard fleet of The Sweepers civilization completely disappeared at the edge of the universe.

They ran extremely fast.

Faster than light.

It seemed that if they were one step slower, they would be dragged over to forcibly participate in an endless square-dancing party.

And all of this.

That "culprit" standing on the bridge of the luan niao starship was completely unaware.

He was looking at the rows of alien warships outside the window, obedient like elementary school students, and happily patted Pikachu's back.

"My friends, today's teaching ends here."

"It seems everyone has made great progress."

"That one from Sirius, don't look away! Yes, you! Hand over the mining permit for that ore vein first, otherwise I will send the video of you dancing the Yangge just now to the entire universe, making you famous in every galaxy!"

"Now, let's talk about the next business deal."

"About opening a branch company in your place, running a hot pot chain..."

Before he could finish speaking.

The screen of the livestream room shook violently again.

This time it was not aliens, nor was it a system error.

It was Jiang Chen's phone, which at this moment erupted with an extremely terrifying—super vibration, even carrying a certain aura of spatial tearing.

Jiang Wanqiu, who had been in a "calm period", finally completely exploded after watching the entire livestream.

There was no text on the screen.

Only a video call request.

And that series of red warning signals that seemed to want to shatter the phone's casing directly.

[Jiang Wanqiu (has fallen into a frenzy): Father God! I saw it!]

[That woman sticking to you! That vixen smelling of perfume!]

[I want to kill her! I want to destroy the entire planet she is on!]

[Don't stop me this time! Whoever stops me, I will kill them first!!!]

The smile on Jiang Chen's face froze instantly.

This damn, it really is a Shura field.

"Zhao Gang! Quick! Run at full speed towards that Centaurus place!"

"Forget about route planning! Warp for me right now!"

"As long as I can see Jiang Wanqiu before that woman crosses over..."

Jiang Chen desperately rubbed his temples:

"My life... can probably still be saved."

At this moment, on the other end of the communicator, Jiang Wanqiu's greatsword had already been plunged into the floor of the Dawn City palace.

In her red eyes, killing intent surged like a tide.

"As long as I can see him..."

"Even if it means crossing the universe... I will tear that woman into pieces!"

"Set sail!!!"