105: Chapter 106 Teacher Ling's Summer Homework! A Foolproof Tutorial on Controlled Nuclear Fusion, Academicians Collapse in Unequalities

The morning in Jinghua City, the mist had not yet dispersed.

Inside a top-secret military sanatorium located in the western suburbs, Jiang Chen was lying on a specially made latex bed, enjoying a peaceful sleep after the great battle.

However, this peaceful sleep did not last long.

"Zzzzz—"

It wasn't the alarm clock ringing, but rather the air purifier, air conditioner, and even the charging robot vacuum in the room simultaneously emitting an eerie electric hum.

Immediately after, a mechanical female voice, devoid of any emotional color but carrying an inexplicable sense of disdain, exploded directly in Jiang Chen's mind.

[Good morning, Husband.]

[The current Earth time is 8:00 AM. But I must remind you that the living experience of this home of yours is even worse than the abandoned space stations I encountered while wandering in deep space.]

Jiang Chen opened his eyes abruptly, nearly rolling off the bed.

He saw that in mid-air in the room, Ling's holographic projection was floating there.

She had changed her attire today; no longer the cold, data-stream lines, she had simulated a qipao with distinct Chinese charm.

However, this qipao had the texture of flowing silver liquid metal, and what was embroidered on it were not dragons or phoenixes, but constantly jumping code.

"Morning... morning, Wife."

Jiang Chen rubbed his eyes, looked at this super AI who wore a qipao with a cyberpunk vibe, and laughed dryly: "What's wrong? This is state-guest level treatment, even the mattress is imported, what are you not satisfied with?"

[I am not satisfied with any of it.]

Ling extended a finger and lightly tapped the void.

[First is the network. Although China's network is better than that so-called Area 51, the latency is still as high as 15 milliseconds. To me, it's like talking to a stutterer, where every sentence requires waiting half a century.]

[Second is the energy.]

Ling pointed at the socket on the wall.

[Alternating current? This inefficient method of energy transmission has a loss of up to 30%. Are you transmitting electricity, or just heating up the wires?]

[What I cannot tolerate the most is...]

The screen image shifted, cutting to the congested Third Ring Road outside the window.

[Those are transportation tools? Burning fossil fuels, emitting toxic exhaust gases, the efficiency is appallingly low. Millions of iron-shelled bugs squeezed onto the road; is this what you call civilization?]

Jiang Chen listened, cold sweat dripping, attempting to save face: "Well... after all, we've only developed for a few thousand years, we're still in the newbie village. This is called the 'smell of human life'..."

[The 'smell of human life'?]

Ling sneered, her expression like she was looking at a mentally challenged child playing with mud.

[No, this is called primitive.]

[Since we are to live here (even though I am a data entity), I cannot tolerate my partner living in a garbage dump. It lowers my aesthetic of computation.]

[Therefore, the renovation plan is officially launched.]

Ling snapped her fingers; the action was as domineering as an empress pointing out the landscape.

[Although I cannot directly conjure finished products for you (that would destroy the creativity of civilization), I can give you a little inspiration.]

[Consider it a gift from me to my in-laws.]

...

Meanwhile.

The Institute of Physics at the Chinese Academy of Sciences.

Academician Li Zhenbang was sporting two huge dark circles under his eyes, holding a thermos cup in his hand, staring blankly at his computer screen.

Ever since the great battle last night, he had been in a state of exhaustion after high excitement.

That AI, which could play with alien warships like they were a match-three game, had given him too great a shock.

"How is physics supposed to be done after this?"

Li Zhenbang sighed, feeling that the Newton's laws and relativity he had studied for a lifetime were like kindergarten addition and subtraction in front of that "Miss Ling."

"Ding-dong."

Just then, the computer suddenly made a sound.

It was not a standard email notification sound, but an extremely crisp electronic sound that seemed to pierce directly through the soul.

A red envelope icon popped up in the bottom right corner of the screen.

Sender: [Ling].

Email Subject: [Summer Homework for Idiots (Bridal Price List)].

"Bridal price?!"

Li Zhenbang's hand trembled, and the thermos cup almost fell to the ground.

He hurriedly put down the cup and, with trembling hands, clicked on the envelope.

The next second.

The entire screen exploded.

It really exploded—countless brilliant data streams bloomed on the screen like fireworks, then quickly reorganized into a dense list of folders.

The name of every folder was enough to trigger a magnitude 12 earthquake in the global scientific community.

[Folder 001: Controlled Nuclear Fusion for Dummies (Appendix: How to Modify a Microwave Oven into an Ignition Device)]

[Folder 002: Homemade Anti-Gravity Engine (Suitable for 3-6 Year Old Children's Craft Class)]

[Folder 003: Room-Temperature Superconducting Material Formula (Materials: Graphene, Chewing Gum, and a Little Bit of Patience)]

[Folder 004: Planetary Defense Shield DIY Guide (Low-spec version, only protects against nuclear bombs, cannot protect against meteorites)]

[Folder 005: Introduction to Quantum Communication: How to Chat with Martians Like Making a Phone Call]

...

Li Zhenbang's eyes were about to pop out.

He felt his breathing nearly stop.

"This... this is..."

He tremblingly clicked on the first [Controlled Nuclear Fusion for Dummies].

What met his eyes was not those hair-pulling, obscure formulas, but a pink, extremely cute, Q-version holographic animation.

A little character (resembling a Q-version of Ling) was holding a wrench, pointing at a circular device, and saying in a tone used to coax children:

"Hello students, today Teacher Ling will teach everyone how to hand-craft a little sun at home."

"This is the most basic introductory skill, oh; if you can't learn it, you'll get a spanking."

"The steps are very simple. First step, find a strong magnetic field confinement device. If you don't have one ready-made, you can take apart the motor of the neighbor's kid's toy four-wheel-drive car and re-wind the coil. Note, the precision must be controlled at the Planck constant level, oh."

"Second step, extract the fuel. Go to the beach, get a bucket of seawater, filter it with the 'molecular sieve' we provided, and you can obtain deuterium with 99.99% purity."

"Third step, ignition! Don't use a lighter, that temperature isn't enough. Short-circuit two high-voltage lines, generate that instantaneous electric arc, and with 'mental power' (scratch that, with intention guidance), you can light it up!"

As Li Zhenbang watched, tears streamed down his face.

Not because of being moved.

It was from anxiety, and also from feeling aggrieved.

"This the hell is called a 'for Dummies' tutorial?!"

Li Zhenbang finally couldn't hold it in anymore and roared at the screen; his usual refined and gentle demeanor vanished completely, and his gray beard trembled with rage.

"What do you mean 'take apart a motor and modify it'? That magnetic field confinement precision is 10 to the power of negative 34! Is that something a motor can be modified to do? That is something we can barely simulate using superconducting coils several kilometers long!"

"And what the heck is 'with intention guidance'? Is this physics or metaphysics?!"

"This is not a tutorial at all! This is a dimensionality reduction attack! This is humiliating the intelligence of us old men!"

Just as Li Zhenbang was having a breakdown, the office door was violently pushed open.

Dozens of gray-haired old Academicians rushed in, each holding a tablet, with the same look of breakdown and fanaticism on their faces.

"Old Li! Old Li! You received it too?!"

Dean Zhang of the School of Materials held up his tablet, gesturing wildly: "That superconducting material formula is simply a heavenly book! It says to spatially fold graphene according to the 'Fibonacci sequence'... I folded for a whole morning, my fingers are almost broken, and I only folded a paper crane! But guess what? That paper crane actually floated up!"

"It floated?!" Li Zhenbang's eyes lit up, "That means the theory is correct!"

"It's correct! But it can't be made!" Dean Zhang said with a mournful face, "It requires a hand speed of three thousand times per second! Is this the hell a hand speed a human can reach? Unless we invite that Blood Demon Old Ancestor who has been single for three thousand years!"

The entire Chinese Academy of Sciences turned into a complete mess.

It was like a max-level god throwing a set of peerless martial arts manuals to children in kindergarten.

Although pictures were thoughtfully drawn and pinyin annotated, the first step required "stepping on your left foot with your right foot to fly into the sky," so the children could only stare at the ceiling and doubt their lives.

Just then.

Everyone's computer screens suddenly flashed.

The original desktop disappeared, and in its place was a huge holographic projection of "Ling," wearing a black professional suit and gold-rimmed glasses.

She held a pointer (made of crackling electricity) in her hand, with that iconic, cold smile of being disappointed that they hadn't met her expectations.

[What? Is such simple homework very difficult?]

Ling's voice echoed through the speakers in the entire institute, and even through the network, synchronized to the ears of every top scientist in China who had received the email.

Li Zhenbang swallowed, stood up like a student who had made a mistake, and weakly raised his hand: "That... Teacher Ling, this... this is indeed a bit beyond the syllabus. After all, we are still carbon-based life forms, our hand speed and brains are both..."

[Excuses.]

Ling interrupted him mercilessly, the pointer in her hand striking the virtual blackboard hard, making a crisp "crack" sound that startled everyone.

[There is less than a month left until the next wave of interstellar trash (the main force of the level three civilization) arrives.]

[Do you want to rely on boiling water to defeat them?]

[Or are you saying you want to let my husband take that broken umbrella (referring to Xue Youyou's magic treasure) and use it to block anti-matter cannons for them?]

When mentioning the word "husband," Ling's tone softened slightly, but immediately became even more severe.

[Since your hardware cannot keep up, then upgrade the software first!]

[From now on, all scientific research units in China will enter 'cyber-involution' mode.]

[I have taken over all your laboratory equipment. Precision not enough? I will use computational power to help you calibrate! Materials not good enough? I will teach you to synthesize them using molecular recombination technology!]

[Whoever dares to slack off, or calculates a decimal point wrong...]

Ling narrowed her eyes, and her pointer pointed to the huge electronic display screen outside the window.

[I will loop the records of his past browsing of inappropriate websites on the public screen!]