156: Chapter 157 The Star Alliance Princess Arrives for a Marriage Alliance? Laying Five Hundred Eggs at Once, Tentacle Seafood Rice?

Just when things were getting heated on the Moon over the grand plan of procreation.

The shockwaves from the love cannon that had just shattered the Boss did not dissipate.

It pierced through the Solar System, through the Kuiper Belt, like a pink cosmic broadcast, spreading towards the depths of the Milky Way.

Three thousand light-years away from the Solar System.

Star Alliance headquarters.

This was a super-civilization center composed of countless massive metal Dyson spheres.

Here, reason was the only law, and data was the only god.

But at this moment, the Star Alliance's supreme council chamber was in complete chaos.

Alert! Alert! Ultra-high energy meme weapon strike detected!

Target coordinates: Edge of the Milky Way, third planet of the Solar System!

Damn it! What kind of energy is that? Why is my emotion inhibitor sounding an alarm? Why do I want to cry? Why do I want to find my mommy?

The Star Alliance's supreme speaker, a silicon-based lifeform with three heads, was watching the playback on the big screen in horror.

On the screen was the very cannon shot that Jiang Chen and the three women had unleashed together.

The screen full of pink hearts, the cringey love-confession projections that made even aliens want to vomit, and that conceptual monster that had been sweet-talked to death.

Too... too terrifying.

The middle head of the speaker shivered: "What dimension of attack is this? It's not physical destruction, but spiritual pollution! They actually used the low-level logic of love to construct a weapon capable of erasing conceptual gods!"

The left head nodded frantically: "This is definitely the most dangerous civilization in the Milky Way! If we go to war with them, our soldiers will be subverted by this pink light before they even fire a shot, turning into losers who only know how to fall in love!"

The right head suddenly had a flash of inspiration: "Wait! If we can't beat them, why not join them?"

Join them?

Exactly! The core weapon of Earth civilization is political marriage! That man named Jiang Chen is clearly some kind of cosmic-level succubus. He relies on mating with females of different races to gain power.

If we also send over a female...

The speaker's three heads lit up simultaneously.

That's right! A marriage alliance!

As long as our princess can marry him, won't Earth's super weapon become our ally?

Quick! Pass the order down! Select the most beautiful Star Alliance Princess! Immediately! Right now! Pack her up and send her to the Solar System!

Earth, late at night.

Jiang Chen had finally managed to escape from that spider cave on the Moon (using the excuse of returning to Earth to get a Change of clothes), and just as he returned to the Xinhuo Bureau office, he hadn't even had time to drink water to calm his nerves.

Ding—

The system in his mind, which had been silent for not long, suddenly exploded again.

[System upgrade complete!]

[Current version: 3.0, Heavens soft rice king: Interstellar Expedition Edition.]

[New feature: Solar System Matchmaking Corner.]

[New soft rice opportunity detected approaching the Solar System! Time until arrival: 3 hours.]

Pfft—

Jiang Chen spat out a mouthful of goji berry tea.

What the hell? Matchmaking corner? I already have three Wives, and I still have to go on blind dates? System, be a human for once!

Before he could finish complaining, Lei Keming rushed into the office, his face flushed red, like a madman who had just won the lottery.

Director Jiang! Director Jiang! Great news!

Lei Keming was waving a deep-space telegram he had just received, so excited that his dentures were about to fly out.

The observatory just received the highest-level diplomatic note sent by the Star Alliance!

They surrendered? No, they're suing for peace!

The Star Alliance stated that to express their respect for Earth civilization, they have decided to send the Star Alliance Princess to Earth for a political marriage!

She explicitly wants to marry you! They even sent over the dowry list! The resource mining rights for three whole star systems!

Jiang Chen heard this astronomical dowry, but his heart didn't fluctuate at all; instead, he felt a deep sense of fear.

Star Alliance... Princess?

Images of aliens from Hollywood movies appeared in Jiang Chen's mind.

Xenomorphs? Predators? Or...

Where's the photo? Is there a photo? Jiang Chen asked, trembling.

Yes, yes, yes!

Lei Keming quickly handed over the tablet, "I have to say, the Star Alliance's aesthetic is still... quite unique."

Jiang Chen took a closer look.

On the screen was a high-definition, beautiful photo.

It was a big octopus that was translucent pink all over, with eighteen tentacles, each with a large eye at the tip, making a heart shape at the camera (though it looked like it was casting a jutsu)?

Below the photo was a line of Chinese annotations that had been translated:

[Princess Gulu Gulu: Ten-time consecutive winner of the Star Alliance beauty pageant. Specialties: tentacle massage, multi-threaded housework processing, laying five hundred eggs at once.]

...

Jiang Chen's phone fell to the ground, and the screen shattered.

What the hell, this is a princess? This is a seafood platter, right!

And... laying five hundred eggs at once?!

Jiang Chen felt his trypophobia about to kick in.

If he really married her, there would be no need to build the lunar kindergarten; they could just convert it into a hatchery!

Just then, the space in the office distorted.

A scent of osmanthus carrying killing intent drifted out.

Change, Ji Linglong, and Ling, the three women, appeared behind Jiang Chen simultaneously.

Obviously, they had also received the news (Ling monitored the global network).

Yo, husband, you're quite popular, aren't you.

Change looked at the tablet on the floor and sneered, "Just finished dealing with the three of us, and now there's a 'tentacle-type' little sister delivering herself to your doorstep?"

Eighteen tentacles... tsk tsk. Ji Linglong drew the taichu divine sword, "If these wrapped around you, husband, could your small frame handle it? Do you need this palace to help you chop them all up to make takoyaki?"

Ling's eyes flashed with red light: "Logical analysis: This creature's tentacles have extremely strong wrapping and suction capabilities, and its reproductive capacity is 500 times that of a human. If this competitor is introduced, our offspring market share will drop to 0.01%. Recommendation: Intercept and destroy."

Jiang Chen, caught between three jealous women and an incoming alien octopus, felt that his life had reached its peak (the peak of collapse).

Wives! I'm innocent! I don't know her at all!

She's the one who wanted to come! This is a political marriage! It's force majeure!

Jiang Chen hugged his head and crouched in defense.

Cut the crap.

Change grabbed Jiang Chen by the ear (even through the belt buckle, the sense of oppression was still there), "Since she's delivered herself to our doorstep, we can't be impolite."

Let's go, back to the Moon.

We're going to set up the bridal chamber. And by the way...

Change glanced at the octopus on the tablet and revealed a nuclear-friendly smile, "By the way, let's prepare some Earth-specialty gifts for this little sister who has traveled from afar. For example... wasabi?"

Jiang Chen looked at this group of women sharpening their knives, and then thought about that tentacle princess rushing over at light speed.

He looked up in despair and looked at Lei Keming.

Director Lei... um...

Can you approve another ten tons of goji berries for me?

No, ten tons isn't enough. Just bring me the country's strategic reserves.

This life is impossible to live anymore!

Lei Keming looked at Jiang Chen's face, which was full of "If I don't go to hell, who will?", and solemnly saluted.

Director Jiang, take care! The country will remember your kidneys... ah no, remember your sacrifice!

Outside the window, the moon was still hanging high.

But under that bright moonlight, a more outrageous, more absurd, and more hardcore journey of interstellar soft rice had just begun.