95: Shen Yueling's thoughts

After breakfast, Yu Heng told Bai Xinran to stay home and think about how to draw the design sketches.

He had to go to the supermarket to buy some ingredients.

They rarely cooked at the Villa, so besides drinks and bread, the fridge only had frozen food.

He changed his clothes and headed out, taking out his phone on the way.

He saw that the message he sent to Qin Lu last night still hadn't been replied to.

He thought for a moment and sent another one.

Yu Heng: "The temperature dropped today, wear something thick when you go out."

Sent successfully; he hadn't been blacklisted again.

But there was still no response. Was she giving him the cold shoulder?

Yu Heng pulled his neck in and mentally calculated the menu.

Shen Yueling liked tomato beef brisket, so that was one dish.

He'd also make some plum pork ribs.

For vegetables, he'd go with garlic lettuce and hand-shredded cabbage; they were easy to make.

He'd buy some minced meat to make meatball soup... Four dishes and one soup for two people was plenty.

As for Bai Xinran... Yu Heng's lips twitched; she could stay hungry for now and eat later.

Yu Heng pushed the shopping cart and went to the fresh food section first.

After getting all the ingredients, he pushed the cart through the beverage section. After thinking it over, he grabbed a bottle of orange juice.

Shen Yueling didn't like carbonated drinks.

—

At 11:20, the doorbell rang.

Yu Heng wiped his hands and went to open the door.

Shen Yueling stood outside the door, holding a paper bag.

"You're here." Yu Heng stepped aside to let her in.

Shen Yueling walked in with a faint expression and placed the paper bag on the shoe cabinet. "I brought you some fruit."

"Alright," Yu Heng closed the door. "Lunch is almost ready. Have a seat first."

Shen Yueling changed into slippers and sat down in the living room.

She looked around; the place was kept quite clean.

Leaning back on the sofa, she scrolled through her phone for a bit before putting it down.

She was actually a bit curious about whether Yu Heng could really cook.

In the past, he could only cook instant noodles or use the rice cooker for rice or porridge, and he never got the water ratio right.

Just as she was thinking this, Yu Heng came out with two dishes. "Time to eat."

Shen Yueling got up and walked to the dining table. Looking at the dishes, they looked decent.

"Give it a try." Yu Heng scooped two bowls of rice and handed her one.

Shen Yueling picked up a piece of hand-shredded cabbage with her chopsticks and put it in her mouth.

Surprisingly, it tasted quite good.

"How is it?" Yu Heng asked.

"It's okay," Shen Yueling said, taking another bite. "Better than I expected."

Yu Heng smiled. "Of course. I learned it specifically for you."

"I don't believe you." Shen Yueling rolled her eyes at him. "When did you learn?""

"Just recently." Yu Heng said without blinking. "Since I'm living at the Villa, I figured I couldn't keep eating takeout."

Shen Yueling didn't ask further and lowered her head to eat.

They ate quietly for a while before Yu Heng spoke up. "Should we talk about yesterday?"

Shen Yueling's chopsticks paused over a rib as she looked up at him. "Talk about what?"

Her voice was flat, devoid of emotion.

"I'm not making excuses. Yesterday morning," Yu Heng put down his chopsticks and leaned forward slightly, "I really didn't think of you."

Shen Yueling put the rib in her bowl and poked at it repeatedly with the tip of her chopstick. "And then?"

"And I didn't expect you to come." Yu Heng looked at her. "When I stepped out and saw the rain, my first reaction was to run so I wouldn't get soaked. It just so happened that Ning Yutong came over to bring an umbrella."

Shen Yueling stopped poking the rib.

"She likes you," Shen Yueling looked up, her voice still flat. "She brought you an umbrella because she wanted you to remember her kindness."

"I know that, of course." Yu Heng nodded. "I know she likes me. She brought the umbrella to give me a surprise, or rather, to make a good impression."

He paused and continued, "But Yue Ling, you're different."

Shen Yueling's eyelashes fluttered.

"Between us, we don't need that kind of thing." Yu Heng's voice lowered. "How many years have we known each other? Our birthdays are only a week apart. We've bathed together since we were kids. I was the one who bought you pads when you got your first period. When my brother had his accident, you were the one who stayed with me at home for several nights."

Shen Yueling's ears turned a bit red, but her face remained indifferent. "So?"

"So," Yu Heng looked at her, "you could have just sent me a message or called me before you left this morning."

He leaned back, his tone relaxing slightly. "If you had, I would have known you were coming. I would have waited at the dormitory entrance for your umbrella. That way, you wouldn't have made a trip for nothing, and you wouldn't have had to stand in the rain watching me walk away under an umbrella with someone else."

Shen Yueling was silent for a moment. "I see. But what about Yu Tong? If you took my umbrella, what about her?"

"That's what we're going to talk about next," Yu Heng added. "Things like bringing an umbrella might happen again in the future."

Shen Yueling looked up at him.

"Since we've already discussed our relationship," Yu Heng explained, "this kind of thing will definitely happen again. If it's not Ning Yutong, it'll be someone else."

"I don't want you to always care too much about these things," Yu Heng continued. "If Ning Yutong or anyone else wants to make a gesture, that's their business. But between you and me, we can be more straightforward. I'm happy that you care about me, and I'll care about you more in the future. But don't let other people affect your mood."

Shen Yueling bit her lower lip. "What kind of logic is that?"

"Yue Ling, do you want to date me?" Yu Heng asked bluntly.

Shen Yueling was stumped; she really hadn't thought about it.

"Do you like me in a romantic way?" Yu Heng asked again, then answered his own question. "I don't think you do. If that thing hadn't happened over the summer break, we'd probably just be childhood friends."

"Whether it was before or now, the reason you get jealous isn't because you want to date me," Yu Heng's voice was calm. "You're competitive; you want to win at everything, including emotions. You're angry simply because you felt ignored, like you lost out to someone else, right?"

Shen Yueling bit her lip, the tip of her chopsticks mashing the rib in her bowl.

Every word Yu Heng said was like a nail. She wanted to refute him but found she didn't know how.

Because he was right—at least partially.

She really hadn't thought about dating Yu Heng. The word "dating" was too formal.

It meant commitment and constraints, along with a bunch of trouble. She hated trouble.

After that afternoon during the summer break, some things had changed.

The way Yu Heng looked at her was different, and her body reacted to his touch.

She didn't know if agreeing to maintain this non-dating intimate relationship with Yu Heng was right or wrong.

But at least her heart and body longed for it; she was just a bit lost.

"So?" Shen Yueling spoke, her voice a bit dry. "Are you saying all this because you want me to stop caring about who you share an umbrella with?"

Yu Heng looked at her and didn't answer immediately. He picked up his water glass and took a sip.

"I want you to stop feeling bad about things like this," he said. "Ning Yutong brought me an umbrella, and I took it and used it. Whether I remember her kindness or reciprocate her feelings doesn't affect you and me."

"What do you mean it doesn't affect us?" Shen Yueling looked up at him. "I feel unhappy seeing the two of you walking under one umbrella. Isn't that an effect?"

"Those are just emotions." Yu Heng put down his glass. "You can have emotions, but they're fleeting. Don't let them control you. Like right now, you're sitting here, the mood has passed, and you're eating my food—yes, food I made specifically for you. This is what's real, and this is happy, isn't it?"

"Then what should I do?" Shen Yueling's voice turned cold. "Watch you get intimate with others and smile and clap?"

Yu Heng laughed. "No need for that. You can tell me directly if you're unhappy, you can make a scene, and I'll coax you. But..." He paused. "Everything has its limits, right?"

Just as Shen Yueling was about to say something, Yu Heng continued, "If you're still unhappy, I can coax you in a more special way."

After Yu Heng finished, he stared at Shen Yueling with a smile on his lips.

"Who wants you to coax them?" She looked away. "Just eat your food."

Yu Heng was amused. Seeing her like this, he knew she was mostly mollified and had likely taken his words to heart.

"That Streamer friend of yours," Shen Yueling suddenly asked, "isn't here?"

Yu Heng swallowed his food and said without blinking, "She is. She's in her room."

"She's not eating lunch?" Shen Yueling looked up at him.

"She's busy," Yu Heng replied vaguely. "She's so busy she forgets to eat and sleep. Don't worry about her."

Shen Yueling didn't ask further; there was no need to pry.

There were always people and things around Yu Heng that she didn't fully understand.

Like that Bai Xinran—how she became his partner to start some Virtual Streamer thing.

Yu Heng wasn't the type to think about starting a business before.

"What are you thinking about?" Yu Heng asked, seeing her zoning out.

"Nothing." Shen Yueling snapped out of it and put down her chopsticks. "I'm full."

"That's all?" Yu Heng looked at the nearly half-full bowl of rice. "Eat a bit more."

"I can't eat anymore." Shen Yueling pulled out a tissue and wiped her mouth. "Eat it yourself."

"Do you have plans this afternoon?" Yu Heng asked.

"Yes, I have homework," Shen Yueling said. "I'll head back once you're done eating."

"So soon?" Yu Heng narrowed his eyes. "Are you sure you don't need me to coax you in that special way?"

"Tch..." Shen Yueling rolled her eyes at him. "I know what you're thinking. Wait a bit longer. I think I'm almost ready."