191: Chapter 191 Sis, I'm going out for a bit.

Those emotions suppressed for too long, those thoughts she never dared to face, those desires and fears hidden deep within her heart, all began to slowly emerge.

Separated from her parents at a young age.

How old was she then? Eight? Or nine?

The exact age had blurred, but that scene remained forever clear.

The day her parents left, her sister held her hand and said, "Mom and Dad will be back soon."

Then they waited and waited, for a day, two days, a week, a month, a year...

They never returned.

Afterward, she followed her sister, living under someone else's roof, reading others' expressions, treading carefully, never daring to say an extra word or take an extra step.

Every time, she would try desperately to appear well-behaved, obedient, and sensible, terrified of being kicked out.

Later, her parents finally returned and even brought them to a very luxurious home.

So she lived happily in that luxurious villa until the apocalypse arrived.

Her father and mother left together.

She had more terrifying experiences, more desperate moments.

She had thought countless times that she would die.

Freezing to death, being taken away by those crazy people.

Finally, she fell ill, thinking she had already died.

But, on the very day she was about to die, Qin Lin and her sister appeared, and that RV appeared too.

She was brought onto that big, warm RV.

From then on, she had a safe place to live, plenty of food, and a warm environment.

And she also had... him.

Brother Qin Lin.

He was her savior.

He appeared at her most desperate moment, pulling her out of Hell.

He was her protector.

Whenever there was danger or they went to search for crystal stone, he would always stand in front.

He was her...

Hers.

Her everything.

Su Yuling closed her eyes, a faint smile slowly appearing at the corners of her lips.

Yes, Brother Qin Lin was hers.

She had met him first, she had liked him first, she had first...

Wait.

She opened her eyes.

That wasn't right.

She hadn't met him first.

Han Yurou had been before her, Aunt Han Qing had been before her, Lin Wanwan had been before her.

She wasn't even second, third...

What number was she?

Fifth?

But she wasn't the fifth to get Brother Qin Lin.

After The Zhou Sisters arrived, she was almost ranked ninth.

Ninth.

This number was like a thorn, piercing deeply into her heart.

She lowered her head, looking at her own hands.

These hands, which could only hug him for a few dozen seconds every day.

Then she would let go, leave, and give up her spot to someone else.

And those people could hug him longer, do more, and even...

Her fingers slowly tightened, clenching into a fist.

Her nails seemed to pierce her palms, causing a slight pain.

Not enough.

This wasn't enough.

She didn't want to just be the ninth.

She didn't want to only receive a hug task every day.

She didn't want to watch others get closer to him step by step, while she could only watch from the corner.

She wanted more.

She wanted his gaze, his attention, his... everything.

Once this thought appeared, it spread like a wildfire, impossible to extinguish.

In the darkness, Su Yuling's gaze began to change.

It was no longer the usual timid, shy look.

Instead... it was something deeper.

It was as if something had awakened inside her.

She remembered what Zhou Yueyue had said.

"A little wanting, but also a little afraid."

Afraid?

She wasn't afraid anymore.

Or rather, the things she feared were different now.

Before, she was afraid of being rejected, afraid of being laughed at, afraid of not being good enough.

Now, what she feared was not obtaining him.

She was afraid of Brother Qin Lin being taken away by others, afraid of being forgotten in the corner, afraid that one day he would no longer look at her.

That fear was stronger than anything else.

Strong enough to overcome all hesitation and shyness.

She stood up.

Her movements were light, making not a sound.

Her bare feet stepped on the floor, slightly cool.

She walked to the window and looked outside.

Outside the window was endless darkness, with a few stars occasionally twinkling.

But she wasn't looking at the stars.

She was looking at her own reflection on the window.

Under the dim light, the reflection was blurry, only showing a silhouette.

But that silhouette looked different from usual.

Standing straighter, head held higher.

The corners of her mouth seemed to carry a hint of a smile.

She stared at that reflection for a long time.

Then she turned around and walked toward the door.

As she passed the bed, she paused.

Su Yuran was sleeping soundly, breathing steadily, occasionally turning over gently.

It was unknown if she was asleep.

Su Yuling looked at her, a flash of complex emotion in her eyes.

This was her sister.

The only person who had never left her since childhood.

Her sister had always protected her, taken care of her, and shielded her from the wind and rain.

But now, she was going to walk her own path.

Not leaving her sister, but... walking a path her sister might not approve of.

She was silent for a few seconds, then spoke softly:

"Sister, I'm going out for a bit."

Her voice was very light, very flat, without fluctuation.

But in this quiet night, it was enough to wake someone who was a light sleeper.

Su Yuran opened her eyes.

In the darkness, she saw her sister standing by the bed, her expression unclear, only a blurry silhouette visible.

"It's so late, where are you going?"

She asked, her voice carrying the hoarseness of just waking up.

Su Yuling didn't answer.

She just turned, opened the door, and walked out.

The door closed gently.

Su Yuran lay on the bed, stunned for a few seconds.

Just now, her sister's voice...

Was too calm.

So calm that it didn't seem like her usual self.

Usually when Yuling spoke, it always carried a bit of timidity, her voice soft and small.

But that voice just now had no emotion at all.

Like a pool of stagnant water.

And before she went out, she didn't even turn on the light, just walked straight out like that...

Su Yuran sat up, looking at the closed door.

An indescribable feeling welled up in her heart.

As a sister, she understood her younger sister too well.

And... that voice just now.

That tone.

Su Yuran suddenly remembered what Han Qing had said a few days ago.

"Yuling has a tendency to develop into a yandere..."

"Surface gentle and cute, inner possessiveness strong..."

"Between attachment type and exclusionary type, or maybe a hidden yandere..."

She hadn't paid much attention at the time, thinking Han Qing might have been overthinking, after all, Yuling had always been so well-behaved.

But now...

She pulled back the blanket and got out of bed.

She walked to the door, opened it, and glanced outside.

The corridor was empty, with only the dim yellow light of the ecological box shining.

The orange light spilled onto the floor, dyeing everything with a warm tone.

But her sister was not there.

Su Yuran stood at the door, looking at the quiet corridor, a complex emotion welling up in her heart.

Heartache, worry, and also a hint of...

An indescribable expectation?

As a sister, she certainly felt heartache that her sister had to experience this kind of psychological struggle.

She knew that feeling.

Wanting something but not daring to ask for it, liking someone but not daring to say it, watching others get closer step by step while she could only tread water in place.

It was too painful.

She hoped her sister could move past it.

But now, her sister had really moved past it, but the way she did it was different from what she had imagined.

Not bravely taking that step, but...

Another way.